The eternal night of Hueco Mundo stretched endlessly across the horizon, the cracked desert floor gleaming faintly under the cold glow of the pale sky. The wind howled, carrying with it the scent of blood, hunger, and madness. It was a perfect day for two idiots to go hunting.
And by two idiots, I meant myself… and Aizen.
Aizen, my three-meter-tall, dog-shaped Hollow companion, bounded across the dunes with his tongue lolling out and his tail wagging. I lumbered after him, my towering Gillian form casting a long shadow behind me.
Most Hollows spent their time fighting, devouring, and desperately clawing their way up the food chain. I? I went on little adventures like this. The hunting wasn't for EP — no, the SYSTEM had made it clear I only earned that through being an absolute idiot. But a good hunt was still good fun… and I had to feed Aizen anyway. Dog's gotta eat.
"GUOOOH!"
(Translation: Let's hunt some Gillians, boy!)
Aizen barked back, his deep, guttural growl sounding something like a muffled earthquake. He darted ahead, sniffing the air before bolting toward a cluster of unsuspecting Gillians shambling in the distance. They were easy targets — slow, mindless, endlessly hungry.
I raised my clawed hand and pointed dramatically.
"GUOOOH!"
(Translation: Attack, Aizen! Show them who's boss!)
Aizen lunged, his massive fangs sinking into the nearest Gillian's neck. The other Gillians reacted sluggishly, turning to retaliate, but they were too slow. I joined in, swinging my huge fists, crushing two with a single blow. Their bodies dissolved into spirit particles, leaving no EP gain for me, just a clean battlefield.
In truth, it wasn't much of a challenge. Hunting Gillians had long since become child's play. If it weren't for Aizen's excitement, I probably wouldn't have bothered. But seeing him wag his tail after each takedown made it worth it.
After about an hour, we'd cleared a good dozen Gillians. Aizen had his fill, and I had stretched my legs.
I sat down on a flat rock, watching Aizen gnaw on a leftover bone like a proud pet. I leaned back and let out a satisfied, echoing roar.
"GUOOOOH…"
(Translation: What a nice day.)
That's when it happened.
A sudden ding echoed in my mind — the familiar SYSTEM notification that only ever appeared when I did something monumentally stupid… or apparently, when I hit a milestone.
[SYSTEM NOTICE: Congratulations! You have survived 100 years in Hueco Mundo.]
[As a reward for your stubborn idiocy, you have received a limited-time system buff!]
[Gift: 'Endless Fool's Blessing' - For the next 1 year, every EP you earn from stupidity will be multiplied by 100x.]
[Current EP: 26,560 / 1,000,000]
[Buff Duration Remaining: 365 Days]
I blinked.
"GUOOOH?!"
(Translation: Whaaaaaat?!)
Aizen perked his ears at my roar, tilting his head in confusion.
I reread the notification, my Gillian brain slowly processing what it meant. For the next year, every dumb, idiotic, ridiculous thing I did would be a hundred times more profitable.
I cackled, a booming, guttural roar that shook the air.
"GUOOOOOOOOOH!!"
(Translation: I'M GONNA BE RICH!)
I leaped up, nearly tripping over a rock, and began dancing like a maniac. Aizen barked, circling me, though whether in excitement or secondhand embarrassment, I couldn't tell.
I didn't know what the next year would hold, but one thing was certain — it was going to be the stupidest, most chaotic, most EP-farming year of my endless Hollow life.
And I couldn't wait.