Dude: man i'm full
Dasch: are you complaining?
Dude: more like blaming myself. i ate too much.
Dasch: you lost self-control. that's not professional.
Dude: i care less.
Dasch: if you care any at all
Dude: i'm thinking of one. if you can wait.
Dasch: you shouldn't have to think hard.
Dude: i'm concentrating. just give me a sec.
Dasch: it's getting late.
Dude: do i distract you when you're pooping?
Dasch: you do watch me. so you do.
Dude: you should've chosen a different time or place. now, that's unprofessional of you.
Dasch: i can't afford it when the storm hits. do you walk up to storm casualities and advise they should have chosen different time or place?
Dude: they're different storms. yours is happening inside. i thought you valued self-control. what happened to that principle.
Dasch: poop isn't part of me so it's outside my self-control.
Dude: if it's inside you, it's part of you. it's under your authority.
Dasch: tell me one thing inside you that you have authority of.
Dude: ...
Dasch: what are you doing?
Dude: i authorized my voice to be silent.
Dasch: ok. i'll give you that. i'm speechless.
Dude: no you just spoke so you weren't speechless. another self-control failure.
Dasch: well, cograts, congrats. hope your life's mission has been achieved.
Dude: now what do you mean by this mission. i don't have any clue.
Dasch: i'm not surprised it's not in your common sense.
Dude: what's so common about it? i doubt others know what you're talking about.
Dasch: lifelong dream, aspiration, purpose, and stuff? got any? wanna have one for once at least while you last on this Earth?
Dude: nah, i'm totally fine without such. you do you. i do me.
Dasch: maybe it's not for everyone. forget it. i give up.
Dude: don't give up on me, as if you had any hope on me.
Dasch: that's right. hopeless darkness. that's where we finally meet.
Dude: it's never too late to begin.
Dasch: no i think it's too late to even give up.
Dude: is there nothing left of us. is this absolute deadend for us?
Dasch: i don't know i thought there was more to this life. something beyond our grasp.
Dude: maybe it's still there, however late we maybe.
Dasch: i think there's none for you.
Dude: how could you be so judgmental. i think you are letting me go short.
Dasch: it has nothing to do with me anymore. it doesn't matter what i think. own your own matters into your own hands.
Dude: so you are stepping away, as if you want to cut all ties at all costs. are you perhaps planning to run away from home, never to return? is this your irresponsible way of saying goodbye?
Dasch: i need to lose grip on you. my squeeze on you may perhaps been detrimental to your life's progress.
Dude: but answer this. what is all this dramatic reverse of attitude. i feel like you been hit with a rock and your head rotated 360 degrees.
Dasch: you know what. getting stoned with a rock might not be such a bad idea. it just might be the kind of shockwave to change the tides of our lives.
Dude: i thought nutcracking was devastating enough. what you are suggesting now sounds closer to suicidal.
Dasch: no, this is like electric brain shock therapy. except, there won't be any electricity. it's just a rock.
Dude: i don't think our heads are made to stand rocks. it's gonna hurt real bad and it's gonna get ugly.
Dasch: maybe we could use soft rounded rocks. that way, our headskin will bounce softly when they are in contact. just like rubbers or trampoline bouncing off.
Dude: but do we want to go through all the struggles to find those rocks outside?
Dasch: yeah, perhaps it's impossible since you barely move your butt out of this room.
Dude: that's the point. plus we can't just move rocks around from where they are supposed to be.
Dasch: what outrage are you speaking of.
Dude: we would be displacing them from their homeland. they are there for reason. we can not force mass exodus.
Dasch: we are moving only one rock. it's just one.
Dude: you don't understand. what if that rock has a family to look after or citizens to be responsible for. it would be like abducting.
Dasch: i promise they don't have such business in their world of rocks.
Dude: we can't be sure. how would you feel, if humans simplify your world, just because you can't voice out to them?
Dasch: but come on there's a huge difference between my status and rock's.
Dude: you think you are so privileged. you really want to watch out rocks. you don't know what they are thinking.
Dasch: they can hardly move. they are just unmoving rocks. goodness.
Dude: you can't know that for sure. have you kept your eyes on one rock specifically. i doubt it doesn't move. imagine a year of wind and humans walking on them.
Dasch: so they didn't move on their own. they were moved.
Dude: the point is they were moved because they could move. they wouldn't have moved if they refused.
Dasch: so you are like a lobbyist or spokesperson for rocks?
Dude: just sharing my thoughts. most important of all, i don't want to be stoned. nutcracking was disastrous and deadly enough for me. i don't know why you only have such extreme measures. it's all about messing around with head.
Dasch: the mind and soul are located inside the head. it's inevitable. that's where the root cause is.
Dude: why don't you just let it heal internally. you know best practice is never having to exert force on it but to let it heal naturally on its own. it's like you are being a doctor who wants to open up the head whenever possible. Like mad doctor or scientist.
Dasch: i never said i am a master of mind and soul healing. i just did what i could. i'm no different than a novice.
Dude: yeah, let's stay away from damaging the head anymore.
Dasch: but then, what else can we do.
Dude: maybe, we just wait and breathe. without obsession to do something. we just let ourselves not do anything.
Dasch: i can already feel tickles. i can't sit idle. i can feel my heart uneasy. i can feel my paws wanting to smash something, probably not your head this time.
Dude: that's basically all the symptoms. these temptations are what set you off. you didn't even decide them to be there. have you wondered why they are there out of nowhere?
Dasch: it's... just what being a dog is like. these are just there. i have no idea. i can't help but feel them. i want to move around. i feel stuck like that rock we were talking about. i don't want to be that rock.
Dude: maybe these rocks are what we need to be. we should let them be and we should let ourselves be like them. think how peaceful and satisfied they are. they hardly need to do anything. they are contented with how they are and way they are. they don't need to speak. they don't need to drink or eat. they don't need to move. this is all because they are at ease.
Dasch: but we are different. we are not rocks. we can't expect be rocks. that's not a fair game. they are already rocks. and we are not rocks at all.
Dude: we can't be the rocks themselves but we can be like rocks and learn the good things being like rocks.
Dasch: then are rocks are masters or sensei as they call it in japanese?
Dude: we are their followers. we consider them our teachers. we merely imitate them.
Dasch: i don't wanna ruin the moode but i kinda have to pee.
Dude: i actually gotta do the same. let's come back to it afterwards.
Dasch: i guess this is not cheating right?
Dude: yeah, this one we can't help it.
Dasch and Dude exit, each heading to their respective peeing places.