Location: Outside Stark Industries, Los Angeles
Viewers: 26,310
Camera Angle: Low Angle Steadicam Hover – Trash Can Cover POV
Danny was back to being homeless again. Not because he was broke. Yet. But because the last motel he stayed at kicked him out for "yelling spoilers at the news."
To be fair, he had been shouting "IT'S HAPPENING" when the Stark kidnapping hit CNN.
Now here he was: twenty feet from the Stark Industries gate, holding a dented trash can lid like it was Mjolnir and he was the trashy god of thunder.
"Alright, chat," Danny muttered. "If anyone asks, I'm a… documentarian. With, uh… avant-garde armor."
[bacon4life]: LMAOOO HE BROUGHT THE TRASH CAN SHIELD
[mod_senpai]: best streamer in the universe no cap
[justlurking]: this finna be the Civil War prequel we didn't ask for
The ground vibrated.
Something boomed in the distance. Windows rattled.
Danny peered through the gate.
"Oh yeah," he whispered. "Big bad Baldy's here."
⸻
Location: Stark Industries – Lower Sector
Viewers: 28,201
Camera Angle: Behind-the-Pipes Shot – Slight Shake
It was like watching two vending machines fight each other.
Obadiah Stane's Iron Monger suit let out a mechanical roar as it blasted through the loading bay, crushing crates and tossing a forklift like a paper towel.
Tony Stark, flying on shaky repulsors, zipped in behind.
Danny squatted behind a stack of crates.
He had no reason to be here. None. Zero. Negative reasons, even. But chat had collectively voted 83% in favor of "live coverage of the Stark Boss Fight."
And Danny? He was just dumb enough to listen.
"Is it too late to pretend I'm Uber Eats?" he whispered.
[hotdog_requiem]: you brought a trash lid you committed bro
[onlygroomable]: he's literally behind the final boss music
[cameramanlives]: PLS GET CLOSER BET U WON'T
Above him, Iron Monger slammed a fist into the ground, sending a shockwave that knocked Danny flat on his ass.
Trash lid flew ten feet and clanged into a wall.
Danny rolled onto his back. "That was my Vibranium, you bastard!"
⸻
Location: Stark Rooftop – Mid-Fight
Viewers: 32,011
Camera Angle: Cinematic Drone Zoom, No Operator – High Altitude Lens
Tony was losing. The Monger suit was stronger, powered by the same arc tech and at least two decades of unwashed corporate guilt.
Danny made it to the rooftop, panting, his hands on his knees.
"I climbed ten flights of stairs for this. I'm dying for content and cardio."
Obadiah's mech stomped across the platform. Tony looked one blast away from retirement.
Then Danny did something he would later describe as "strategically comedic disruption."
He screamed.
Like, really screamed.
"YOOOOOOOOOO BALDY YOU A BITCH!!!"
[potatogirl]: AINT NO WAY
[dev__dawg]: YOURE GONNA DIE
[chatmod_tommy]: TONY JUST LOOKED AT YOU WTF
Obadiah turned.
The metal faceplate creaked toward Danny like an eye from Mordor.
"Oh no," Danny whispered. "I drew aggro."
The mech launched a mini missile.
Danny screamed again and dove behind a rooftop vent. The missile hit a satellite dish instead.
"THAT WASN'T EVEN A GOOD STREAMING SERVICE!" he yelled.
⸻
Location: Behind a Smoking AC Unit
Viewers: 34,509
Camera Angle: Helmet-Level POV, Heavy Vibration Detected
Danny crawled like a battlefield news anchor. His hoodie was half-melted, his sneakers singed, and his trash lid nowhere to be found.
He popped up just long enough to yell, "Tony! Hit him with the triangle maneuver!"
Tony yelled back, "What the hell is the triangle maneuver?!"
"I DON'T KNOW I'M JUST A GUY!"
[hellaspiderfan]: BEST CROSSOVER EVER
[justlurking]: THIS MIGHT BETTER THAN AVENGERS 1
[onepatchman7]: @justlurking he finna stream that tooo
[mrdepression]: THE TRASH GOD HAS NO FEAR
Suddenly, Tony used a repulsor blast to blind Obadiah and redirect power.
The rooftop exploded in sparks and light.
Danny was flung backwards into a wall with all the grace of a beanbag tossed by a giant.
Then—darkness.
⸻
Location: Los Angeles General Hospital
Viewers: 37,120
Camera Angle: ICU Monitor – DannyCam
Danny groaned.
"Am I dead?"
A nurse's voice: "You're alive. Mild concussion. Minor burns. Sprained ankle."
Danny blinked at the ceiling. "Damn. I tanked that."
[mod_senpai]: YOU LIVED LETS GOOOO
[burnt_toast]: TRASHCAN GOD SURVIVES AGAIN
[drdoompls]: plot armor stronger than vibranium
The curtain pulled back.
Agent Phil Coulson stepped in. Calm. Crisp suit. That no-nonsense, "I pay my taxes and watch PBS" aura.
"Danny," he said. "You've been busy."
Danny blinked. "Hey man."
Coulson didn't flinch. "We've been monitoring your stream."
"Which part?" Danny asked. "The rooftop trauma or the part where I called Obadiah a bitch?"
Coulson ignored that. "Mr. Stark asked about you."
Danny's eyes widened. "He remembers me?!"
"Yes. He also wants you to stay thirty feet away at all times."
"Fair."
Coulson handed him a card.
"Just in case," he said, then turned to leave.
Danny turned the card over. Blank. Then blinked.
It now read: S.H.I.E.L.D. – We're always watching.
He shrugged. "Creepy. But okay."
[justlurking]: BRO MET COULSON AND SAID "OKAY"
[tightpantz]: you can't make this up
[cameramanneverdies]: Danny lore expanding
⸻
Location: Motel, That Same Night
Viewers: 38,992
Camera Angle: Side-Bed Confessional – Fluorescent Buzzing in Background
Danny sat on the bed, half-wrapped in gauze, chewing on a slice of pizza.
"Okay. So maybe I shouldn't have trash-talked Iron Monger while holding an actual trash can lid."
[burnt_toast]: but it was worth it
[dev__dawg]: i clipped the missile part
[aussie1naruto]: top 10 anime battles
He leaned back, staring at the flickering ceiling light.
"But I think I'm getting used to this."
Pause.
He looked up.
[hellaspiderfan]: don't ever stop
[mod_senpai]: you're the main character now
[justlurking]: protect this man at all costs
Danny grinned.
"Cool."
He bit into the pizza and immediately recoiled.
"Why does it taste like battery acid?!"
[mod_senpai]: because you bought it from a vending machine, dumbass
"Okay but in my defense," he said, "I earned this L."
And the camera feed dimmed… but didn't turn off.
It never did.