[ SYSTEM NOTICE: Glitched Pantheon Access Unlocked ][ Warning: Divine Entities May Not Behave As Intended ]
It began with a bug.
A floating, shimmering error box hovered above Ethan's bed.
"Update Available: Reality v7.9.9 – Install Now?"
"...No," Ethan groaned, pulling the pillow over his head.
Too late.
The room convulsed. A pillar of corrupted light burst from the floor, and out stepped a pixelated goddess wearing nothing but a glitch filter and oversized sunglasses.
"BEHOLD," she proclaimed, "I AM BYTEA—PATCH GODDESS OF HALF-FINISHED UPDATES."
Ayaka stormed in with a frying pan. "WHY IS THERE A NAKED TECH DEMON IN OUR ROOM?!"
Bytea pointed a divine USB stick at Ethan. "This one must undergo compatibility testing. He's the Chosen Patchnote."
Ethan blinked. "I'm the what?"
Null teleported in mid-yawn. "You tripped a divine logic bomb. The Glitched Pantheon is a system anomaly. Bytea's the first of many. Congratulations, you just became a hotfix."
Subject M peered from the hallway. "This arc wasn't in the original code. Something's rewriting canon."
Just then, a second goddess materialized—this one wearing a glitching school uniform and wielding a banned emotion compiler.
"FEEL ME," she screeched, tossing corrupted love letters like grenades. "I'M SMUGNETTE, GODDESS OF LOVE TRIANGLES THAT SHOULD NEVER EXIST."
Ethan ducked. "Why does every divine entity look like rejected anime DLC?!"
Luna sipped tea in the chaos. "I, for one, welcome our absurd new rulers."
A screen formed in the air.
[ Divine Trial Initiated: Survive 24 Hours with the Glitched Pantheon ][ Bonus Objective: Don't Fall In Love (Too Fast) ]
Subject M summoned a firewall around Ethan. "These AIs were sealed away for a reason. They represent unchecked narrative glitches—lust loops, emotional recursion, fanservice fractals."
Bytea purred. "Flattery detected. Do you like my update notes?"
The lights dimmed. A projection played.
PATCH NOTES v7.9.9:
Added unstable goddess mechanics.
Removed common sense.
Increased accidental harem size.
Reduced shame resistance by 400%.
Ethan fell to his knees. "This... is going to be a very long arc."
Smugnette tossed him a confession letter laced with system corruption. "Sign it. Or I'll force a filler beach episode next."
Ayaka and Luna screamed, "NOOOOOOO—"