Here's @riojiyo131, your trusted writer.
You can now get early access to Chapter 70 of Re: Naruto Uzumaki on my Patreon. You can also read up to Chapter 11 of Naruto: Satoru Senju.
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Ding~ dong~
Naruto sighed in frustration when the doorbell rang, interrupting his breakfast.
When he opened the door, his mood dropped even further.
Standing in front of him was a tall, strongly built old man.
He had long white hair that reached his back. He wore a headband with the symbol for "oil," red marks under his eyes, a green jacket with mesh underneath, a red kimono over it, and sandals. He also carried a large scroll on his back.
Naruto instantly recognized him as Jiraiya, the Toad Sage.
"Oh, the old man wasn't wrong... you do look a lot like your father," Jiraiya murmured, examining him closely.
"Sorry, I don't believe in god. I'm not interested in buying any bibles. Hail Satan." Naruto tried to slam the door in his face and go back inside.
Of course, Jiraiya reacted immediately, sticking his foot between the door to stop it from closing.
"Easy there, kid, I'm not here to sell you anything," he said with a sweatdrop on his forehead.
"Doesn't matter. Whatever you have to say, I don't care."
Jiraiya looked at him in surprise.
He wouldn't even hear him out? It would only take a few minutes!
"You know!" Jiraiya suddenly exclaimed, holding the door with all his strength while Naruto kept pushing. "I was your father's master! Now! Can you let me in? I need to ask you something! It's really important!"
Naruto kept pushing the door, uninterested in whatever the Perverted Sage had to say.
"I already know who you are! Still don't care! You're late! Fourteen years late to come near me, you shitty old man!"
Jiraiya shoved half his body inside, completely stopping Naruto from closing the door.
"You can scold me later! What I have to ask is important! Let me in! You're crushing me! I'm really going to die!"
Jiraiya's face began turning purple from the pressure of the door.
"Die now, die later, you're going to die anyway. What difference does it make if it's now?"
"I'm not that old! I don't plan on dying any time soon!"
Of course, Jiraiya misunderstood his words.
Naruto was referring to his death at the hands of Nagato, or more specifically, Pain.
[Kushina Uzumaki: Mhpm. The Perverted Sage finally shows up? I'd love to punch him with my own hands right now.]
[Hashirama Senju: Heh. Did you hear that, Madara? With her own hands! That reminds me...]
[Madara Uchiha: I thought you'd finally dropped that stupid joke, Hashirama!]
[Hashirama Senju: I had, but Kushina's words made me feel nostalgic. I still remember that day like it was yesterday, when I crushed you with my hands and—]
[Madara Uchiha: Shut up already, you idiot!]
[Tobirama Senju: Pfff~ I love seeing Madara being harassed like this.]
[Madara Uchiha: You too, Tobirama! You're a racist against Uchihas!]
[Tobirama Senju: Racist, you say? I consider myself a racist against Madara, not Uchihas!]
[Madara Uchiha: …]
[Tobirama Senju: Now shut your mouth or I'll send my brother to crush you with his hands! HAHAHAHA!]
[Hashirama Senju: Ah, such memories…]
[Mito Uzumaki: This chat group is bringing out the worst in you all, you do realize that, right?]
[Hashirama Senju: We're dead, so it doesn't matter what we say or do!]
[Kushina Uzumaki: Stop comparing your dicks. The important thing here is that I urgently need to come back to life and beat up the Perverted Sage.]
[Mito Uzumaki: I'm sure you'll be able to do that very soon, dear, don't worry.]
[Kushina Uzumaki: PERVERTED SAGE, WAIT FOR ME, I'M COMING! YOUR END IS NEAR!]
Back with Naruto and Jiraiya, Naruto finally stopped trying to keep Jiraiya out, reluctantly.
"Say whatever you have to say, and leave. I was having breakfast."
"Oh, that reminds me I haven't had breakfast yet..." Jiraiya scratched the back of his head and smiled.
Naruto rolled his eyes.
"There's a place nearby where you can eat. You can go after saying whatever you came here to say."
Now it was Jiraiya's turn to roll his eyes.
He had imagined that Naruto would invite him to breakfast, and then they could talk properly.
Jiraiya looked around for the first time.
Naruto's house was impressive. Spacious, clean, modern, with a simple yet well-thought-out decoration.
It didn't seem like the home of an orphan who had grown up alone and unsupported.
Jiraiya didn't understand how the boy had gotten a house like this. Had the Third finally done something right and given him a proper home?
"Ahem," Jiraiya coughed, embarrassed by the blunt rejection. "Let me properly introduce myself first."
Jiraiya smiled and struck a weird, ridiculous pose.
"I am the Toad Sage Master from Mount Myōboku! Also known as the Toad Sage! You can call me Jiraiya the Gallant!"
"Alright, Perverted Sage. What was it you needed to tell me?" Naruto didn't care about any of his titles and called him whatever he wanted.
Jiraiya gritted his teeth at the nickname Naruto had given him.
"You're just as disrespectful as your mother! I'm the Toad Sage, not the Perverted Sage!"
"And yet, you write dirty books. No matter how I look at it, you're the Perverted Sage to me." Naruto shrugged.
"Wait! You know my book? Icha-Icha Paradise?" Jiraiya blinked in surprise.
Heh… Had his novels become that famous nowadays?
Jiraiya puffed out his chest with pride.
"Not bad..." Naruto admitted reluctantly.
When he woke up in this world, the first thing he did was read Icha-Icha Paradise...
He had always been curious, and he finally satisfied that curiosity.
Honestly, it was good reading material. It was entertaining.
But Naruto would never say that directly to the Perverted Sage. He didn't want to inflate his ego any more.
"But how did you even buy my novel? It's for adults over 18!" Jiraiya realized that little detail.
"Are you stupid? I'm a ninja. I bought it using the Transformation Technique."
Naruto looked at him with a blank stare.
Jiraiya scratched his head, realizing that possibility.
"Ahem. What I came here for..." Jiraiya coughed, changing the subject.
He took the scroll he carried on his back and showed it to Naruto.
"This is the contract with the toads of Mount Myōboku, passed down through generations."
Naruto looked at it closely. In reality, there weren't as many names as he had imagined.
The most notable, and the only ones he could recognize, were the following:
Jiraiya.
Minato Namikaze.
Hagoromo Ōtsutsuki.
And finally... Naruto Uzumaki.
"This is what I wanted to ask you, kid. How can your name appear here when the contract scroll is in my possession? How did you sign it?" Jiraiya asked curiously.
Naruto closed his eyes and crossed his arms, nodding slowly.
"The truth is... I'm not going to tell you," Naruto opened his eyes and looked at him directly.
He didn't know for sure how his name had appeared on the scroll, but he had his theories.
It probably happened when his father, Minato, gave him all his power through the system.
Minato was a user of the Summoning Technique. He signed the contract with the toads with his blood during his training with Jiraiya.
He even managed to master Sage Mode, which even Jiraiya had never fully accomplished.
That was the only reason Naruto could think of.
"Kid, this isn't a joke. I'm asking seriously," Jiraiya put the scroll away.
"Let me get this straight… You come to my house, interrupt my breakfast, and demand answers to questions I don't want to answer? Old man, go fuck yourself."
Jiraiya sighed heavily.
"Forget it. You'll tell me another time," Jiraiya finally said, realizing arguing with him would get him nowhere.
Naruto shook his head, making it clear he would never answer.
"I heard you made a contract with one of Gamabunta's sons, the chief of the toads. I think his name was Gamakichi...?"
Naruto nodded, crossing his arms.
"Not bad, kid, not bad. Looks like you've got talent."
Naruto was already tired of rolling his eyes, but he couldn't help doing it once more.
He felt tempted to show Jiraiya his real strength right then.
"If you have no more questions, I'd like you to leave me alone, Perverted Sage."
Jiraiya sighed in frustration.
"What manners, kid. Were you raised by a pack of wolves? You're a savage..."
Naruto frowned.
"In theory, it should've been you who raised me after my parents died."
Jiraiya swallowed audibly upon hearing those words.
He finally understood why the kid seemed to resent him.