i open my eyes. It's Sarah, laying in bed with me. She's awake, looking at me, i think she was watching me sleep. It's the most beautiful wake up ever, as the yesterday one, and hopefully as the next day one. Again, i could and hope to, get used to this view every morning. She sees that i woke up and smiles at me. i don't want this morning to ever end.
"You slept well?"
"Very well. you?"
"i slept pretty ok, but i woke up wonderfully."
She smiles again, but this time a trace of worry comes on her face.
"Are you feeling better?"
"Yes, my wounds start healing up. i don't feel as tired as before. i feel like i'm starting to recover."
"About, the tower thing…"
"i don't want to talk about that now."
"Do I care if you want to talk about this or not? I want to know what you meant yesterday, and why did you thought it happened whatever you thought it happened."
Sarah frowns a little and looks at me menacingly.
"i…don't know."
"you know, but you don't want to tell me."
"i told you, it has to do with the fact that i got to Matt and George before something bad would happen. And i guess, you at least should give credit to that, as it did happen, and i did got there before anything bad happened. And it has to do with something from my past, something from my childhood. i can't tell you more, but it's important. Our lives depend on this."
Sarah's face saddened, something pains her tremendously and she's looking at me with compassion or something… i think she feels betrayed. i can't tell her anything now. She'll think me crazy if i tell her what happened while i was in a coma, and what i found under the tomb in Brașov, all that i found until now. All that happened to me in these last days, it seems unreal, that's what i also thought…
There are too many things real, and things that, maybe, i just imagined them. If i'd have to keep a score of them, i think…it's a tie between what is real and what could be unreal. But the risk is too big to not do anything on the basis that there are 50% or even 80% chances that i imagined it all. Even 99% chances. The risk is too big, and the outcome too worse. i'm forced to see everything as it is shown to me, the tower is being built, i have to stop it. No matter what.
We both lay now on our backs watching the ceiling.
"Matt is better, I've talked with Andreea last night. you want us to go visit them today? you talk with him and see how he's doing. you both went through some horrible stuff, maybe you could help each other."
i don't answer. i don't want to go and see Matt right now. i know that he didn't wrong me with anything, poor guy, but i still feel that i'd need some more time before facing him.
"So…you befriended Andreea, and Matt. You met them?"
"Yes, they came to see you, while you were, out."
"Cooool…"
"Sooo, you wanna go see them?"
"i…no. i don't want to right now. i'll go first to the police station to be over with the statement or whatever that is."
"We'll go."
"We'll go."
i get up from the bed, Sarah gets up too. We change our clothes, she goes to the bathroom to get ready and we meet again in the foyer. We both get our shoes on and look at each other. i don't want her to come with me, i want after to try and find out some more about the tower. But i don't want to push her away either. And middle grounds are a fucked-up fantasy.
"I guess you don't want to eat anything before, right?"
"No…"
"What a surprise. Let's go."
"Are you sure you want to come? Because after, i want to go…"
"I'm coming. And we'll talk after, where we're going from there."
"Alright, let's go."
Sarah goes in front of me and opens the door, we both get out of the apartment. She stays to lock the door and i head towards the elevator trying to put some order in my thoughts. i don't think i can tell anything to Sarah, for her to let me continue with my ad…search, without divulging something about all this story that surrounds me, and anything that i'd say to her, any information i'd let slip, it wouldn't do anything but make her even more sceptic about my mental health.
In front of the elevator door, i don't stop, i make another step forward and hit the door. Rubbing my nose i'm looking at the door confused, i don't know why i did this, i think i wanted to go through. i turn to Sarah which looked at me even more confused.
"i didn't, i…wasn't paying attention, i was thinking about something and continued walking…and…don't mind."
Sarah turns back to the door to take the key out, puts it in her bag and comes to me.
"Button?"
"The next thing i would've tried."
i press the button, the elevator comes and we get in. i look at Sarah, she keeps checking her phone, i try to peek without being noticed, but the elevator arrives at the ground level.
"We're taking the taxi?"
"No, why? There is no point, we're taking the bus just two or three stops."
"i thought you're making an order."
i point to her phone. She looks at it.
"No…I'm waiting for a call from…my doctor."
"Your doctor? Why do you need to talk to a doctor? Something's wrong?"
"No. I just have to do my usual tests."
"What tests?"
"As if you don't know how it's with us women. We do regular checks. I'm going to check…the usual stuff. I'll also go check my breasts because I think I felt a lump or something while I…"
"Squeezed them?"
"You're incredible. I'm just doing my regular checks."
"Let me see."
"What?!"
"The boobie."
"Not here on the street!"
"How cruel."
"I'm cruel, how abut you that…"
"Hmmm."
"No, it doesn't matter. Just don't leave like a no-good madman anymore, go disappear who knows where, because I'm going crazy because of you."
"i'll stop leaving for no-good, i'll just leave for good."
"Stop joking with this!"
"You know that i'll never leave you, ever."
"I know nothing."
As we wait for the bus, she continues looking at her phone and i looking at her.
"Sooo…you wanna make sure that the child machine is working well…"
"you pig. With your fucked up jokes."
"Oh, alright, i'll remember this answer to give it back to you when you'll bring up this subject."
"Of having kids?"
"Yeah…"
She looks at me, blushing, but also wearing the biggest of smiles i ever saw. Fuck. She melts me like crazy. i swear she can play with me, do me the fuck she wants to do me. It scares me. But then she instantly goes sad, like something else came to her mind that bothers her immensely.
She's sad. It must be because she's worried about me, i keep seeing her like this, i keep bringing her in this state. i have to stop making her worry this much, i keep hurting her and making her sad instead of happy…
The bus is here.
"C'mon, get in the bus. You know nothing, that's…incredible."
We get in.
"you have a card?"
"No."
"I'll pay for both of us then."
"my saviour."
"Shut up you…you…no-good boyfriend."
"i love you."
She goes quiet, pretending she didn't hear anything. i…have to convince her somehow to let me continue my mission. i have no idea what could i tell her or how could i convince her to leave me alone… i don't like how this sounded. i don't want her to leave me alone… i look at her, she's troubled, concerned. i don't know what to do.
"You heard me?"
"Hmm?"
"i'm here declaring my eternal love for you and all you can say is, hmm?"
"Get to the door, our stop is coming."
"So you don't love me."
We both get out of the bus and walk towards the station, on the sign it says: 'Bucharest Traffic Brigade'. She looks again at her phone, looking through her messages. i get my head close to hers to see what she's looking at. She notices me but doesn't hide her phone. It's a doctor the person she's texting with. Cel… i didn't get to see his whole name before she locked her screen.
"It's not nice to look through a girl's phone."
"No? That means you have something to hide, because you can look through my phone as you please."
"That's not why."
"Or even worse. It's something you don't want to share with me."
Sarah makes a pause.
"Stop jumping to conclusions."
"Probably you don't trust me. Or you don't love me. After all, you didn't say to me yet that you love me. Because you don't."
"Shut your stupid mouth. you start to get on my nerves."
A policeman was walking on the same path as me but towards me. i turn my head and notice him and make a quick step to the side, almost going into him. He was looking at his phone, not looking where he's going.
"you keep going in the wrong direction."
That's…i look back at the cop and he stops too to look at me.
"Watch out for the abyss!"
i stop suddenly, scared, but it's already too late, i don't feel the ground under me anymore. i fall. But right after i feel something hard at the tip of my foot. Sarah, that was holding my hand, pulls me up. i manage to put my feet on the ground and get up.
"Can you even walk without someone helping you?"
i look under my foot, there was a small hole in the asphalt. Not even a five centimetres fall. i turn back to the cop, he was far, walking and talking on his phone. Sarah was looking at me and waiting for an answer.
"i…can, i can, i just wasn't paying attention."
"you don't seem to be paying attention today at all."
"Yeah. i, turned around, i thought the cop was talking to me. And alsooo you that have your eyes stuck to that phone, as if you're waiting for a message from god himself, are in no position to talk."
"I'm…ugh…whatever."
We both go in the precinct and stop at the information desk.
"Hello."
"Oh, hello there, how can I help you?"
"Ah, genera…"
"Stop, don't…"
Sarah stops me from continuing my response and turns back to the lady.
"We came here for a statement. Eugen Stan told us to come here and talk with him. Is he here?"
"I don't know let me check. Go sit down on the bench there and I'll call you when I get an answer."
The woman grabs the phone receiver then releases it, sits down and pushes the chair to slide to the other end of the room where there was another phone, she uses that one. We sit down on the bench and wait.
"When you said that we came here for a statement, i thought you were about to say next, for a statement of, my love towards my prince. Because you still haven't told me that you love me."
"We should go see a doctor. It seems to me that you have some problems up there."
She taps her head slightly as to indicate that i'm crazy. i laugh, she just smiles slightly, she abstains from laughing, but then she goes quickly back to her state of unrest.
"We should really go see the doctor, after. I want to calm down, to know that you are alright."
"You want me to go have a mammogram?"
"Not to my doctor. And I'm not joking."
Sarah throws a very grave gaze at me. As if trying to convince me just with her eyes.
"i feel good. Trust me. If you want, we're going the day after tomorrow, anyway that's the day i have the appointment scheduled with the doctor."
Sarah turns her sight and looks at the ground.
"Sarah. i'm good. i feel good. Everything is alright, more than alright even."
The woman finishes talking at her phone and comes close to the window.
"Mister Eugen will come down immediately."
We both wait on the bench in silence. i'd like to talk with her, but there are so many things that i want to tell her and i can't. Because i don't know what i could be talking with her without letting, something that i don't want her to know, yet, slip out.
Coming from the stairs above, a dozen of light, chaotic steps echo the entire lobby. They are coming down in a hurry. At the same time, i hear another pair of steps, these ones are slower and heavier. After a bang and another series of quick steps, i see a child running down the stairs. He jumps the last four steps and then awaits at the base of the stairs looking up. The kid was happy and full of energy. At the head of the stairs, comes a man, dressed in a shirt, a tie and some long jeans. In his feet he had a pair of casual sneakers. The man comes down the stairs in a hurry too and stops at the kid.
"Where is your mum? You seen her Petru?"
"No."
The man is holding his palm behind the kid's head, softly to not hurt him. Then turns and sees us.
"Ah, I hope you've not been waiting for too long."
Sarah answers.
"No, we just arrived five minutes ago."
"Ok, it's good, let me let the boy off to his mother and I'll come take you after. It won't be long."
"No worries. We'll wait."
Sarah looks at the kid, she has a tender gaze, desirous, exactly how a man would look at a sports car. Through the door comes in a woman, she seems more older than the man. The boy runs to the woman and hugs her.
"Mum, mum, look, I took my fingerprints."
The child shows his fingers to his mother, they were dark from the ink.
"Oh my. You've let him get his fingers so dirty and didn't clean him at all?"
"Eh, let him, he's a child."
"Oh…"
The mother sighs, pulls out a pack of wet tissues and takes the kid's fingers to wipe them. The man turns to us, comes to us but takes another look at the mother and the boy.
"You're good? I have a little work now and have to go."
"Yes, yes, go to your work…"
"Come after me."
me and Sarah both get up from the bench and follow the man. We go up two series of stairs and stop in front of a wooden door. It looks old, and on a bronze colour plaque was written: 'Chief Inspector Eugen Stan'. The man takes out from his pocket a ring of keys, searches for the right key and unlocks the door with it.
Inside there we are greeted by this huge desk, the room is well aired, well lit, and spacious. The man closes the door behind us and shows us two chairs at the desk to sit down. He then sits too on the other side of the desk.
"Well… The thing goes like this, I called for you here to give a brief statement and sign a paper. Nothing serious. The accident was one that…we were waiting for. We gathered all these years some more complains and statements from civilians, stating that the news cars are stopping wherever they want without any regard to the law. And they obstruct traffic and even put the lives of other traffic participants in danger. We tried for many times to act on this but without success. your accident, even though tragic, came to our aid. The news van was stationed illegally on the emergency band, in an area with restricted traffic because of the road works. So legally, nothing will happen to you and we don't want anything to happen. We need this event so we can raise an alarm signal to the others that think they can park anywhere they want, using the Press ID."
"And my statement? What do i write…"
"Uhm. Nothing. We have here already a statement written for you, in case you want to sign this one please read it well first, if you want to write another one, it's your right, and mistake. The best for you is the best for us in this situation, and I advise you to sign this one."
The man hands me a paper full of text. i look over it, Sarah comes close to me to read too. In this paper, i declare that i'm not guilty for the accident, and because of the presence of the car from the television on the emergency lane, i crashed right into it. It also says that i had an emergency and had to stop right away on that lane that was obstructed by a vehicle illegally stopped, according to law, article, paragraph…
This paper absolves me of any fault. i can't believe how much luck i had that there wasn't any other vehicle there, stopped for emergency reasons. And them being in the wrong here, i think their insurance should cover my dad's work car repairs. Which is good. i put the paper on the desk and look at the man.
"Yes, i'll sign this."
The man gives me a pen and i take it and sign the paper, i look once more at it and give it back to the man, along with the pen.
"It's good. With you we're done. In the worst-case scenario, you'll be called to give a testimony in case the television company will appeal, but I don't think so. The deal is set in stone, they have no chances to win and they should know that too."
The man gets up, i get up too with Sarah. The man stretches out his hand and i shake it.
"If all is well, we won't see each other again, so farewell and be very careful when you drive. Next time there may not be a vehicle stopped illegally there. Or may be nothing there to stop you at all."
"Yeah…thank you."
We get out of his office. Go down the stairs and out of the police station.
"Now?"
"Well, i told you, i don't want to go to the doctor today, i'll go when he scheduled me."
Sarah checks her phone again and talks with me without even looking at me.
"Alright, let's…"
Her phone rings. She looks at the caller then answers.
"Ah, the incredible boyfriend that deserves all the attention finally calls."
"Shhh!"
She looks at me angry and makes sign to shut up.
"Yes… Of course I'll come… Can we… Yes, I'll come today then… Alright…goodbye."
Sarah finishes her call and puts her phone into her pocket, she then looks at me and tries to concentrate on something, tries to form a sentence in her mind.
"So who was that?"
"The doctor?"
"The doctor…? codename the boyfriend…?"
"Just, I'm not in the mood for this right now. I have to go to his cabinet and do my examinations."
"Now?"
"Yes. I was scheduled, but a problem appeared…and he said that if I can come now, he can see me, but if not, it will have to be in a few weeks."
"You want me to come with?"
"No, you go home and eat something, I'll go to the doctor and then I'll come to…our new home too."
"Thanks to our beneficiary, George…"
i laugh, Sarah smiles just and then looks at me serious.
"Alright, i see you at home. Our new home."
"Alright."
"But i'll stop at the library first. i won't stay too long."
"I better find you home when I come back."
"i promise."
"And eat something on your way at least."
"i'm going right now to buy something."
Sarah makes a step to get away, to look for the bus, but i grab her and pull her to me. i kiss her.
"Stop leaving like that."
"you'll see me again in a few hours, I won't be disappearing for entire days like others."
"Yes, sorry i went into a coma. So selfish of me."
"you are. My bus is here, you can let me go."
"Never."
She kisses me back.
"Ah, doing some warm-up before your meeting with the doctor."
"Fuck you."
"Love you."
"Love you too."
Sarah goes into the bus and looks at me, the doors close and the bus drives away. The way she keeps her eyes on me, as if she doesn't trust me. And now that i'm left alone…