The most dreaded event at Sōbu High the monthly school-wide mock exams had finally arrived.
Two days had already passed since the warehouse incident where the three of them had exchanged wordless glances.
"Yukinoshita, did you bring all your pens?" Miura asked, her tone unusually serious as she leaned over before the exam began.
Yukinoshita gave a small nod in reply.
But Miura didn't stop there. She reached over and picked up several of Yukinoshita's pens, checking each one thoroughly. Only after confirming that they were all in working order did she hand them back.
"I heard one of the teachers writing the exam questions for second years is Fukuyasu-sensei, Yukinoshita."
Yukinoshita tilted her head slightly, a quiet gesture of confusion.
Miura understood. For someone like Yukinoshita who rarely spoke, that little tilt of the head was as expressive as words.
Fukuyasu-sensei was an infamously strict and exacting teacher at Sōbu High. Whenever he contributed to the exam questions, the difficulty always spiked dramatically.
And along with it came the inevitable chorus of student complaints and despair.
"With Fukuyasu-sensei involved, the test's gonna be tough," Miura murmured. "So if it gets hard while you're working on it, don't panic. It'll be hard for everyone."
Yukinoshita nodded again.
Maybe it was because she wasn't wearing her usual frosty "keep away" expression, but the silence she held now seemed... oddly gentle.
Miura even had the impulse to pat her on the head but in the end, she restrained herself.
Yukinoshita glanced at her, puzzled by the visible concern on Miura's face.
Even her own mother had never looked at her with such worry.
Now that she thought about it, her parents had rarely ever taken much interest in her. They barely attended any school events either.
They were always too busy caught up in important engagements, business dinners, fundraisers. Attending something like a parent-teacher meeting, where the time cost far outweighed the benefit, simply wasn't on their radar.
With a quiet breath, Yukinoshita let those thoughts drift away.
She'd been through more than enough to learn not to waste emotions on things like that.
Clearing her mind, she unfolded the test papers that had just been distributed, twisted the cap off her pen, wrote her name, and began.
In this moment, the exam was her battlefield, and her pen was her sword.
She no longer craved the approval or affection of others. She no longer tried to force herself into belonging.
She fought now only for herself.
This life so thoroughly wrecked by the golden-haired Yukinoshita had no room left for overloaded expectations of anyone.
…
This month's mock exams were brutally hard. Even Yui Yuigahama, who usually hovered around the middle or lower end of the class rankings, found herself struggling.
Following the study outline Yumiko had prepared for her, she tackled the easier, high-probability questions first, then moved on to the ones she had a vague grasp of, grinding her way through. The really tough problems, the ones that were just complete mysteries to her? She pretty much gave up on those.
No point stressing over questions that she wouldn't be able to solve even if she studied another ten years, right?
That was the essence of the Yuigahama Ultra-Optimistic Exam Strategy™!
Japanese, geography and history, civics, science, foreign language six subjects over two days. By the time the last one ended, it was already Friday, just in time for the weekend.
During the final homeroom period, Hiratsuka-sensei made her usual appearance half heartfelt, half terrifying.
As she smacked her lesson book loudly against the desks for emphasis, she smiled (which only made it worse) and reminded them that those who bombed the mock exams next week would be put on the school's official retake list.
Cue collective classroom wailing.
Yuigahama felt more than a little guilty. Even though Yumiko had helped her cram, she was pretty sure she'd flunked at least one subject.
She glanced over at Yukinoshita, who sat quietly, her expression calm like the idea of being on the retake list had never even crossed her mind.
Yuigahama slumped back onto her desk, her thoughts adrift.
Up until that night in the warehouse, Yuigahama Yui had tried her best not to admit it but she could no longer ignore the truth.
Yukinoshita... really wasn't the same Yukinoshita anymore.
Back then, they had been partners in crime failing tests together, taking makeups together.
That Yukinoshita used to smile at her with all eight front teeth showing. She dyed her hair in chaotic colors, debated which local nail salon was the best, and called her "Yui" like they were sisters.
Of course, that same Yukinoshita also drew painful lines between them. She confessed that she liked Hikigaya-kun, and then ripped into Yuigahama for being stupid enough to fall for lies. She admitted that the only reason she'd gotten close to her was because she'd been hanging out with Hikigaya-kun a lot at the time.
The first friendship Yuigahama formed in high school was with Yukinoshita.
The first betrayal she experienced... was also from Yukinoshita.
She had tried so hard to convince herself That's just how Yukinoshita is. She's just changed again.
This new Yukinoshita treated everyone with indifference, spoke to no one unless necessary, like a shard of ice buried beneath fresh snow. She acted like they'd never even met.
She called her "Yuigahama-san."
Yuigahama didn't know what hurt more: being abandoned, or being treated like a stranger.
That night, behind the closed door of the warehouse, in that heavy, lightless silence, Yuigahama had somehow found the courage to speak up.
She had said, "Yumiko is my most important friend. I don't want her to go through the kind of pain I once did."
Silence.
Yukinoshita didn't respond.
Still, Yuigahama pressed on. "I told you once before whether you're trying to use someone or trying to make a mistake just do it to me instead. That offer still stands, Yukinoshita."
No response.
Yuigahama let out a quiet sigh. "You don't have to hesitate. I've already been through it once. I can take it better than Yumiko could."
Silence again.
That was when Yuigahama felt something was off.
She quickly stepped toward the faint sliver of light near the door and there, curled up in the darkness, was Yukinoshita.
She was crouched down with her arms around her knees, trembling violently.
"Yukinoshita? Hey, what's wrong? Say something!"
Panicking, Yuigahama dropped to her knees and reached out. Her hand touched Yukinoshita's forehead and cheeks both slick with sweat.
And the moment she touched her, Yukinoshita suddenly lunged forward and clung to her, tightly like a drowning girl grabbing hold of the only lifeline she could find.
"Don't leave me…"
Her eyes were squeezed shut, her fingers shaking, her entire body wracked with tremors in the pitch-dark.
Her voice, low and trembling with the edge of tears, felt like a taut string about to snap.
"Please… don't go. Onegai… Nee-san…"
Later, Yumiko told Yuigahama that Yukinoshita had once been locked inside a school bathroom overnight lights off, completely alone by a group of classmates when she was very young.
She'd screamed for help for almost an entire night.
After that, she probably developed some form of nyctophobia.
No not just some form, Yuigahama thought. She had never seen Yukinoshita break down like that before.
She had just stood there, frozen.
What a joke, she thought. I didn't even know something like that about my friend.
Can I really call myself a good friend…?
NEXT CHAPTER : I Can't Stop Thinking About It
(As exams loom and tempers fray, old wounds and quiet guilt resurface. Yukinoshita tries to mend fences, but Yui and Miura both struggle with feelings they can't quite name—guilt, worry, and something far more complicated. When Miura returns home, surrounded by warmth and gifts, her thoughts drift back to Yukinoshita's lonely world. For some reason… she just can't stop thinking about her.
Next chapter: When feelings grow too loud to ignore, what do you do with a heart that won't stay quiet?)
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