Rayen Wu stared at the gates of the Azure Serpent Sect, flanked by two stone serpents coiled in eternal judgment. They seemed to glare at him like twin thesis advisors.
"Well," he muttered to himself, "I suppose there's no turning back now. Unless I want to go back to dodging boars the size of scooters."
He stepped forward. The guard at the entrance—a sleepy-looking youth with a bun hairstyle and enough acne to classify as terrain—yawned and pointed at a line of newcomers.
"Outer sect applicants. Back of the line."
Rayen nodded, taking his place among the assorted hopefuls. A few carried swords. One glowed faintly. A girl beside him was meditating while floating a pebble. He, meanwhile, was trying not to pass out from hunger.
:: Recommend temporary fasting protocol. Blood sugar at 62 mg/dL. You are functioning at 28% mental efficiency. ::
"Not helping, Q.E.D."
"Next!" a robed examiner barked.
Rayen stepped forward. The man glanced at a jade tablet and tapped it. It flashed dull red.
"No spiritual root," the examiner sighed. "Next!"
"Wait," Rayen said. "Is that your entire diagnostic method?"
"Yes."
"No multivariate analysis? No latent affinity tests? What about bioenergetic resonance harmonics?"
The examiner blinked. "What?"
Rayen sighed and pulled the tablet from his hand. "Q.E.D., patch in."
:: Accessing artifact interface… modifying diagnostic script… calibrating… complete. Scanning… ::
The tablet pulsed with light.
:: Result: Trinary pseudo-root structure. Affinities: Fire (34%), Metal (41%), Chaos (unknown—requires further study). ::
The examiner stared. "That… shouldn't be possible."
Rayen handed it back with a smirk. "Congratulations. You've just discovered your first quantum cultivator."
They let him in.
His room in the outer sect was spartan: one bed, one desk, one training mat, zero Wi-Fi. A bamboo scroll titled Foundational Breathing Techniques lay on the table.
He unrolled it and frowned. "These diagrams look like someone crossbred yoga poses with epileptic calligraphy."
:: Beginning translation… Technique: Breath of the Verdant Core. Purpose: Qi induction via harmonic respiration. Inefficient. Estimated 14.2% absorption rate. Suggest hybrid modification. ::
Rayen nodded. "Alright. Let's turn this medieval wellness retreat into a laboratory."
He sat down cross-legged, focused on the rhythm, and applied his knowledge.
"Breathing isn't just air intake—it's pressure differential, waveform modulation, and thermal cycling."
Q.E.D. assisted, adjusting his posture, enhancing micro-muscle alignment. Within minutes, his meridians began to tingle. Qi—barely perceptible—flowed in.
Rayen grinned. "It's working. Slowly. But—"
BANG. The door exploded inward.
A bulky teenager with a buzzcut and zero neck barged in. "You! New guy! Time for welcome sparring!"
Rayen blinked. "Sparring?"
The teen grinned. "Yeah. Initiation tradition. I punch you. You survive. Maybe."
Rayen stood slowly. "Okay. First, rude. Second—"
He raised a hand.
"Q.E.D., analyze opponent's kinetic pattern and suggest counter."
:: Analysis complete. Suggest evasion step 1.7 meters left followed by knee to groin. Probability of success: 86%. ::
He dodged.
The teenager's punch whooshed by. Rayen kneed him. The boy folded.
Rayen dusted his robe. "Quantum martial arts. Try reading that in a scroll."