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Chapter 35 - The Scroll of Mild Chaos (Also Known As "Why Is It Screaming?")

Midnight. Arin sat cross-legged in his tiny dorm room, lit only by a single flickering talisman. On his lap rested the Scroll of Mild Chaos.

It hadn't moved for hours.

Which was suspicious.

> "Okay," he whispered to himself. "You survived sword girls, trash missions, and a possessed bathhouse. You can handle one cursed scroll."

He unsealed it.

It screamed.

Loudly.

> "WHY ARE YOU OPENING ME AT NIGHT?!" the scroll howled, the ink rearranging into furious eyebrows.

Arin nearly threw it out the window. "WHY ARE YOU ALIVE?!"

> "I CONTAIN CHAOS. AND POETRY."

> "…What."

---

System Warning

> [Ding! You have activated a Forbidden Relic.]

[Mild Chaos Engaged.]

[Warning: Side effects may include hallucinations, bizarre luck, and conversations with inanimate objects.]

Arin blinked. "Wait. I already do that."

> [Secondary Warning: The scroll has a personality. You may hate it.]

> "I already hate it."

> "You wound me," the scroll replied, pouting through calligraphy.

---

The Scroll's First Curse

The next morning, Arin walked into the sect cafeteria.

Every disciple turned to stare.

> "...Why are you glowing?" Yue Lan asked.

> "I don't know."

> "Why is your hair sparkling?" Yura added.

> "I REALLY don't know."

> "Why are your clothes changing color every five seconds?"

> "Okay that might be the scroll."

He held it up.

> "Behold. The sentient disaster."

The scroll unrolled itself dramatically. "You're welcome."

One disciple fainted.

---

Mission Summons (Again)

> [Ding! Emergency Mission: Investigate Spirit Tomb Ruins in Mist Valley.]

[Party: Arin, Yura, Yue Lan, Jun Bai (mandatory).]

Arin squinted. "Wait. Jun Bai is joining?"

> "Yes," said Elder Yuehua, handing over the map. "Team balance is important."

> "You're trying to kill me via jealousy-based homicide."

---

Into the Tomb

The group reached the foggy ruins by noon. Giant statues lined the entrance—spirits frozen mid-scream.

Yura sniffed. "This place smells like haunted tofu."

Jun Bai unsheathed his sword. "Let's move."

Arin raised his scroll like a flashlight.

> "Lead the way, mild chaos."

> "I hope you get bitten by an ancient spirit rat," it whispered.

---

Inside, they found:

A puzzle door with 999 shifting tiles

A pit of spikes shaped like motivational slogans

And a floating ghost who refused to leave without singing opera

> "This is the worst dungeon I've ever seen," Yue Lan muttered.

> "And I've seen our sect library."

---

Boss Fight (But It's a Lizard)

Deep inside, a giant spectral lizard rose from a stone coffin.

> "YOU HAVE ENTERED MY DOMAIN!"

> "Sorry," Arin said. "We were looking for the bathroom."

> "DIE!"

Combat ensued. Jun Bai slashed. Yura summoned foxfire. Yue Lan threw talismans.

Arin? He opened the scroll.

> "CHAOTIC VERSE: RANDOM EFFECT ENGAGED!"

The ghost-lizard froze.

Then began... crying.

> "My ex broke up with me 400 years ago!"

> "I just wanted a friend!"

Everyone stared at Arin.

> "...Did I just hit him with ghost depression?"

> "You weaponized emotional trauma," Yue Lan muttered. "Again."

---

Aftermath

The spirit granted them treasure and vanished.

Yura found a spirit crystal.

Yue Lan claimed a high-grade talisman.

Jun Bai got a sword technique scroll.

Arin got…

> "A rock?"

> [That rock is a beast egg.]

> "A what?"

> [Warning: May hatch into something weird.]

The scroll whispered, "You're now a father."

> "NOOOOOOOOO—!"

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