Ryan never felt full. He couldn't remember a time when he had. Every day was the same—chasing something he could never name. It was always just out of reach, shifting the moment he tried to grab it.
His phone buzzed. His eyes flickered to the screen, searching for that fleeting release. A notification. Another thing to keep him distracted. Another thing to fill the empty space, even if just for a moment.
He opened the message without thinking. Another click. Another image. Another hit. It never lasted, though. It never filled the hole, never eased the weight pressing down on his chest. His fingers scrolled, desperate for something—anything—that would dull the noise, make the world fade.
But it didn't. It never did.
He snapped his phone shut, as if the action could erase the thoughts crawling through his mind. His reflection stared back at him from the bathroom mirror—hollow. Like someone had scraped the life out of him and left nothing but a shell. He didn't know who he was anymore. Just that he was tired. Tired of chasing something that never gave back what it promised.
A knock on the door shattered the silence.
Ryan took a deep breath and stood up, forcing himself to move. He wiped his face with his sleeve, but he knew it wouldn't wipe away the guilt. Or the shame. Or the urge.
When he opened the door, his friend—Danny—was standing there, eyes wide like he had something important to say. But Ryan didn't care. He had stopped caring about everything a long time ago.
"Hey, man. You alright?" Danny asked, looking him up and down.
Ryan stared at him. Every word in his mouth tasted sour. "What do you think? … Actually, I'm fine."
Danny didn't buy it. He never did. Ryan could never hide anything from him—not the way he felt, not the way he had been sinking deeper into the same darkness every single day. But Danny didn't know. No one did.
Not yet.
"I'll be fine," Ryan said, forcing a smile that didn't reach his eyes. "I just… need some time."
Danny hesitated, then nodded. "Alright. Just don't forget that you've got people around you, okay?"
Ryan stared at the door after it closed, feeling the weight of the words hanging in the air. He didn't want anyone's help. No one could fix him. Not even Danny. Especially not Danny.
He slumped onto the bed, phone still in his hand. The pull was there again, pressing into his chest. It was always there. Always waiting. His mind raced. Maybe just one more time. Just a few minutes. Just enough to escape.
But something felt… off.
The darkness in his room seemed heavier, like something was watching him. A shiver crawled up his spine. His breath quickened. And for the first time in a long time, he felt it—the weight of what he had become.
Then, just for a moment, he heard it. A whisper. A voice that wasn't his.
"Keep going."
Ryan froze, his hand trembling around the phone. His heart pounded in his chest. He looked around. There was no one there. No one except him.
But that voice—it felt so real. So… familiar.
Before he could process it, the phone vibrated again. Another notification. Another hit.
He couldn't stop now. Couldn't stop the urge.
The darkness in the corner of the room seemed to shift.