The days bled into one another, a haze of confusion and desire that Eli could no longer ignore. Every time he closed his eyes, J.M.'s face seemed to hover there, his voice a constant hum in the back of Eli's mind.
"You're not going to be able to keep running from this forever."
Those words had haunted Eli since J.M. left his apartment the night before, and yet, they weren't the ones that plagued his thoughts most often. No, it was the way J.M. had touched him, the feeling of his fingers against his skin, the warmth of his breath against Eli's ear. That small, almost intimate moment had stayed with him like an unshakable shadow.
It had been a mistake. Eli knew that. But the more he tried to distance himself from it, the more it seemed to slip through his fingers. The more he tried to ignore the heat that flared every time J.M. was near, the more impossible it became to deny that there was something between them. Something undeniable.
Something dangerous.
Eli sat at his desk, his fingers stilling over the keyboard. Work had become a distraction, a feeble attempt to focus his mind on something anything that wasn't J.M. But his thoughts kept straying back, tugging at him, pulling him into that dark, magnetic pull that J.M. seemed to have over him.
"Damn it," Eli muttered under his breath, rubbing his temples in frustration. He couldn't keep doing this. He couldn't keep pretending that this was all in his head. He couldn't keep denying the way his body reacted when J.M. was around.
The doorbell rang.
Eli's heart lurched in his chest.
He wasn't surprised. He knew who it was before he even opened the door. He had been expecting this. In fact, he'd known it was only a matter of time before J.M. would come knocking again. But that didn't stop the flutter of nerves in his stomach as he made his way to the door.
When he opened it, J.M. stood there, just as Eli had imagined casual, effortless, with that same dangerous smile on his lips that seemed to promise everything Eli wanted and everything he feared all at once.
Eli didn't say anything. Didn't have to. The silence between them was heavy with everything unsaid.
J.M. raised an eyebrow, his gaze flickering over Eli. "I see you've been busy," he remarked, stepping inside without waiting for an invitation.
Eli didn't stop him. He couldn't. Not when J.M. had that look in his eyes, the one that made Eli's breath catch in his throat.
"What do you want, J.M.?" Eli asked, trying to sound unaffected. But even to his own ears, his voice was strained.
"I think you know what I want," J.M. replied smoothly, his tone laced with a quiet confidence that made Eli's chest tighten.
Eli clenched his fists at his sides. "No. You're wrong."
J.M. stepped closer, invading Eli's personal space in a way that made Eli's pulse spike. His gaze never left Eli's face as he spoke, his voice low and almost intimate. "Am I?"
Eli's breath hitched. He wanted to step back. He wanted to tell J.M. to leave, to get out of his life and stop messing with him. But something in him something deep and raw kept him rooted to the spot.
J.M. smiled as if he could hear Eli's thoughts, as if he knew the struggle raging inside him. "I can see it, you know. How badly you want this. How badly you want me."
Eli swallowed hard, his throat dry. He wanted to scream, to shout at J.M. to stop playing these games. But the words wouldn't come. Instead, he stood there, frozen, unable to tear his gaze away from J.M.'s intense stare.
"You've always wanted this," J.M. continued, his hand reaching up to gently touch Eli's cheek. The touch was light, almost tender, but it sent a wave of heat crashing through Eli's body. "You're just too scared to admit it."
Eli's heart pounded in his chest, a steady thrum that echoed in his ears. He wanted to pull away. He wanted to fight this feeling. But instead, his body betrayed him. The soft caress of J.M.'s fingers sent a jolt of electricity through him, and for a moment, he didn't know where he ended and J.M. began.
"I'm not scared," Eli whispered, the words barely audible. But even as he said it, his voice trembled.
J.M.'s smile widened, as though he had won some silent battle that Eli didn't even know he was fighting. "No, you're not scared. You're just… conflicted." His thumb brushed against Eli's lower lip, the gesture so intimate, so overwhelming, that Eli's breath caught in his throat.
"I'm not conflicted," Eli managed, though his voice faltered. "I don't need you."
J.M. chuckled softly, a sound that sent shivers down Eli's spine. "You're a terrible liar, Eli."
Before Eli could protest, J.M. leaned in, his lips hovering just above Eli's ear. "I know what you need," he whispered, his voice dark and full of promise. "And I'm here to give it to you."
Eli's stomach flipped. His hands trembled at his sides, unsure whether to reach out or push J.M. away. He knew he should do something—anything—but he couldn't move. He couldn't bring himself to stop this.
Instead, he stood there, caught in J.M.'s orbit, feeling every ounce of resistance crumble away with each passing second.
"I've been patient with you, Eli," J.M. murmured, his lips brushing against the shell of Eli's ear. "But I'm done waiting."
Before Eli could respond, J.M.'s lips were on his. It was a kiss that was slow, deliberate, and all-consuming. There was no hesitation, no doubt in the way J.M. kissed him. His lips were soft and demanding, pressing against Eli's with a heat that left no room for questions.
For a moment, Eli stood still, frozen in place, before the kiss ignited something in him. Something that had been lying dormant, waiting for the right moment to awaken. His hands moved on their own, reaching up to tangle in J.M.'s hair, pulling him closer.
J.M. responded in kind, deepening the kiss, his hands sliding down Eli's back, pulling him flush against his chest.
Eli's thoughts scattered, his heart racing in his chest, as he let himself get lost in the sensation of J.M.'s touch. It felt like the world was spinning around them, the noise of everything else falling away as they both gave in to the undeniable tension between them.
But even as he kissed J.M., even as he allowed himself to feel every spark of desire, Eli couldn't shake the feeling that this was just the beginning. That J.M. was playing a dangerous game, one where the stakes were higher than Eli was ready to admit.
And for the first time in a long time, Eli wondered if he was in too deep to get out.