He pressed his lips together, swallowing back the sarcastic comment that nearly slipped out, and turned his attention back to the scroll.
Fugaku Uchiha.
The moment Hiruzen Sarutobi saw the name, his face darkened.
Just yesterday, the little brat had beaten up two villagers who were fighting.
Then, using his fists, he forced the two to hug it out and spend the entire afternoon "reconnecting with love."
After that, he made them write an 800-word written pledge promising to always keep love in their hearts.
Hiruzen had no idea what to even say to that. He was just—speechless.
You couldn't exactly say it was wrong—making people embrace love was technically a good thing!
But if you called it right... it felt downright bizarre.
The old Fugaku Uchiha wasn't much different from the other Uchiha kids—stern-faced, proud of his clan's honor.
But now?
He couldn't care less about clan honor. All he ever talked about was spreading his "theory of love," using his fists to promote Uchiha integration into Konoha—to become one big, loving family.
Ideologically, it was very in line with the "Will of Fire." But behavior-wise...
There were no words.
As for Rie, well—let's not even get started.
The one thing all three of them had in common was how fiercely they valued their comrades.
And just thinking about that made Hiruzen's expression twist into something unreadable.
They were good. Really good. Strong, loyal—exceptional assets to the village. But their personalities were completely unmanageable.
In short: one unhinged teacher had produced a full set of weirdos.
With a sigh, Hiruzen muttered under his breath,
"If we ever get another promising young talent, we absolutely cannot let Reiji get anywhere near them.
Who knows what kind of disaster we'd be unleashing?"
...
While the Third Hokage was solemnly making this decision, on the other side of the village, Reiji and Jiraiya were squatting in front of a spiky-haired blond kid, grinning and goofing around.
"Hey, Blondie, be our witness!
Whoever eats fifty skewers of takoyaki last has to hold this book up and shout 'Sakumo Hatake is so dreamy!' three times!"
The blond kid gave the book in Reiji's hand a long look—its title: Forbidden Love: Butsuma Senju vs. Tajima Uchiha. He shook his head, deadpan.
"Nope. Not doing it. You're both idiots.
Our teacher at the Academy said not to hang out with morons."
At that, Jiraiya—still drooling at the sight of the takoyaki—let out a squawk.
"Hey, kid, who's your teacher?!"
"Nakaryū Ōzora!" the blond replied proudly, eyes wide and full of innocence.
Reiji and Jiraiya exchanged glances, a mischievous glint passing between them.
Without even thinking, Reiji's brain started cooking up something wicked.
"Kid, Nakaryū Ōzora really is a powerful guy. Even this idiot here agrees."
Jiraiya looked like he wanted to punch him, but grudgingly nodded.
"But!" Reiji leaned in, eyes twinkling.
"I've got a super-powerful jutsu that can take him down in one second!"
"What jutsu?!" The blond immediately perked up, full of curiosity.
With a wicked grin, Reiji said softly, "Watch closely—Inu... Tatsu... Ne... Inu... I... Mi... Shi... Tora..."
In a puff of smoke, three shadow clones appeared at his sides.
And then—he clapped his hands together again.
"Transformation!"
With a sudden shout, four or five stark-naked, voluptuous girls burst out of the smoke, giggling and clinging to Jiraiya with shameless affection.
In a flash, Jiraiya's nose sprayed blood like a fountain, and his face turned beet red.
Beside him, the blond kid's cheeks flushed bright red too.
Instantly, Reiji dispelled both the Clone and Transformation Techniques, pointing at the boy's crimson face while slapping his thigh and howling with laughter.
"Jiraiya, look at this brat blushing. You can tell he's a troublemaker already—bet he grows up to be Hokage!"
Embarrassed and fuming, nose still gushing blood, Jiraiya didn't hear a word. He socked Reiji hard and sent him flying.
"You bastard, Reiji! What kind of idiotic jutsu is that?!"
...
In the Hokage's office, Hiruzen Sarutobi stared at the crystal ball on his desk, calmly dabbed his nosebleed with a handkerchief, and muttered with forced composure,
"Utterly immature."
...
As dusk settled in, Reiji parted ways with Jiraiya after polishing off the last of the takoyaki. His usual grin slowly faded as he headed home.
Three years.
Time to pay Danzō a visit.
With that thought, he turned into a dark alley by the roadside.
The world spun—
Reiji reappeared in the shadowy depths of Root's underground base.
Not far away, Danzō sat atop a high stone chair, one hand propping up his chin while the other idly twitched with writhing black tendrils.
Sensing an unfamiliar presence, Danzō raised his head and looked toward the shadowed figure.
"Who's there?" he growled.
A quiet chuckle answered him. Reiji stepped out of the darkness into the flickering candlelight.
Danzō's brow furrowed hard. The black tendrils instantly recoiled into his arm as he muttered grimly,
"Long time no see, Reiji Sakuhō."
The moment he spoke, more than a dozen masked Root operatives flickered into view, surrounding Reiji in a heartbeat.
But Danzō quickly waved a hand to dismiss them.
He'd spent too much effort grooming these loyal agents—he wasn't about to let Reiji wipe them out on a whim.
At his signal, the Root members vanished in a blur, swift and efficient.
Reiji spoke evenly.
"Danzō, it's been three years. Isn't it time you handed over the Earth Grudge Fear technique?"
What?!
Danzō's heart nearly stopped.
Reiji shouldn't even know that name.
Back when they captured Kakuzu, Danzō had tried every interrogation method—but the guy was tight-lipped, wouldn't spill a single detail.
In the end, he'd had to resort to his hand-picked Yamanaka Clan operatives to dig the intel out of Kakuzu's mind.
So by all rights, the only people who knew about Earth Grudge Fear were himself... and those now-dead Yamanaka members.
His thoughts raced.
No way. Under no circumstances could he let Reiji get his hands on that technique.
He couldn't beat this guy before—and if Reiji learned it, he wouldn't even be able to outlive him!
How the hell was he supposed to become the Eighth Hokage then?!
Screw that!
"I don't know what you're talking about! Stop making things up!" Danzō waved his arms frantically, head shaking like a rattle.
Reiji gave him a sideways glance, full of disdain, clicking his tongue.
"Oh, come on, old man. Why are you still pretending? I saw those black threads coming out of your hand."
Danzō's face turned even darker. He glanced at Reiji nervously but kept stubbornly shaking his head.
Reiji rolled his eyes hard, clearly annoyed. His fist clenched with a loud crack.
"Don't make me beat it out of you."