It was dark, a few hours passed while I slowly stretched my arms, waking up.
"Mmhh, yeah, knew it was a dream after all. I can already smell the joyful scent of my favorite food from the kitchen." I opened my eyes. "Mya? HOOMAN! YOU ARE… ALIVE! I WAS SO SAD AND NOT MESSING AROUND WITH UR NOM PWOH—"
"STOP BITING MY NOSE, God damn it…"
"Mya?"
"If you were that sad… WHY ARE YOU MUNCHING ON MY NOSE? AND WHY CAN YOU TALK IN THE FIRST PLACE?!"
"Ahhh, mya~ hehe... nam… heh… nam… Let's leave the unimportant stu—"
"IT'S PRETTY IMPORTANT, GOD DAMN IT! AND STOP NAMMING MY NOSE!" I carefully tried picking him up, but he already jumped and rolled back.
"I WAS BORED! Too bored… You passed out for hours! HOW COULD YOU? HMPH!" He turned his head away, standing on two legs with crossed paw arms.
"TSUNDERE CAT!? I DON'T NEED THAT…! Albeit you're pretty impressive standing on two legs if you're not an illusion of my mental sanity decreasing… Considering the recent events, I'd say the chances are pretty gosh darn high."
"Mya~' impressive mya? hehe.. Thank you kindly, young sir. purr—Wait... no no no… I'M A TALKING CAT AND THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE IMPRESSED ABOUT?!"
"I'M IMPRESSED ABOUT BOTH!"
"Oh—Then that's alright, worship me, HOOMAN!"
"No."
"Sad."
I continued staring at the cute cat, not knowing whether I was a complete lunatic or if he was actually real.
I touched his head, dropping his top hat, slowly petting his soft black fur.
"Purr, that's the spot, hooman... mm, Meoww."
"Your real…"
"Of course, I'm real. What makes you think otherwise?"
"Well, a talking cat standing on two legs isn't as common as you'd think, albeit it does happen from time to time… At least back home."
"Meoow~ Back home you say~ Mm." He licked his paw arm. "I was wondering who called me forth."
"'Forth'?"
"mmm… leaving that aside, hooman." He pointed with his paw behind me, on the ground.
"Might wanna check on that. Some kinda warnings came as I was playing on it, yeah?"
"Warnings…? WARNINGS?" I turned as fast as I could, remembering those bright white flashes. I almost stumbled down to grab my phone.
WARNING: MISSION WILL BE FAILED.
WARNING...
WARNING...
"FUCK, FUCK, FUCK… FUCK!" I clicked onto the warning so it would send me into the app. "MISSION? WHAT MISSION, GOSH DA…"
The cat continued licking his paw, tilting his head. "Hooman?"
I frantically entered the app, and now there was a fifth tab on the home page.
THIS WASN'T… NEVERMIND, JUST—I entered it quickly, and there it was:
"Mission: Pass to the other side of the forest. Time of accomplishment: (1 hour and 56 minutes, 44 seconds, 33 milliseconds, 1 hour and 56 minutes, 43 seconds, 32 milliseconds… Failing to complete the mission will result in DEATH."
"So my theory... was right… Aha... haha... ha…"
I looked forward toward where I thought the river was. Impossible... IT'S IMPOSSIBLE, GOD DAMN IT, IMPOSSIBLE!
"I RAN FOR HOURS, HOURS! HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME NOW…"
I clenched my teeth in anger and started running.
"Myeow~ Hooo~man." That's right, the cat! I stumbled back, picked the cat up, and continued running toward where I thought the river was, as fast as I could.
"Mm, I'm hungry~ Quite hungry…"
"..."
"Hooman~"
"YOU... You..." Realizing there's no point in venting out on a cat, I just shook my head and continued running. "Listen... I got you in a box, yeah? Logically thinking, considering this is like a FUCKING... game... You're my companion, so if I die, YOU DIE AS WELL... And... I could die very soon—"
"Mya... Death? THE great I CANNOT die! Setting that aside now, I DEMAND FOOD!"
"Sure, sure... The great you can't die... What a bothersome cat…" Looking around, I realized there was a bunch of the same yellowish fruit that had earlier hit my head. "You eat those things?"
"Genanas? THEY ARE A DELICACY, NYAAA!!" His eyes lit up, and not being able to handle his cuteness, I jumped and barely picked one. The bushes behind me rustled.
"NYAA, GIMME GIMME GENANAS, GENANAS YAAY, WAIIII, HEHE~!" I gave him the fruit, and he started peeling it, like a real banana. Cutting small holes in the skin, then biting it off.
Finally, I felt the same chill from before, coldness ran through my spine. I almost saw death again as the cat bit into the fruit.
"AlrightYyy, pwact is in mm... m pwace! GEnanaaaas are a reall…"
He jumped out of my arms, still with half of a genana in his mouth.
"DELICACYYY!"
"O-OOI, IT'S NOT THE TIME FOR THIS! GET BACK HERE!"
I barely turned, hitting my back on a tree since the speed I was running was too high for me to suddenly stop—G-Ouch.
The cat stood on all fours now, still biting the "Genana," and in front of him stood a two-meter-tall figure, wearing a coat and a black cape, with a scythe in his left hand.
"Hyuman, stand back! I, the GREAT, shall deal with this unbenevolent and UNlovable GIGANTO RABBIT!" Then he sent his left paw straight toward the figure, who, in turn, blocked it with his scythe.
"WHA—YOU CRAZY? YOU CAN'T DEFEAT A MONSTER LIKE THI—WHAT EVEN IS THIS?"
As I spoke, the cat already jumped an incredible two meters in height and sent his left paw with his claws out in a direct cut to the figure's face, but the thing blocked it with his scythe.