The endless pale desert of Hueco Mundo buzzed with excitement. The Bone Circle gathered in a rough, lopsided ring around the coming duel. The sky was still its same empty grey, and the bone towers of Baraggan's crumbling castle stood crookedly behind us. The tension was thick.
I stomped forward, grinning ear to ear.
"GRUUAAHH!"
[Translation:Begin!]
Baraggan, lazily leaning against his throne, translated with a sigh.
"He says, let's get this disaster started."
Yammy Llargo, his big dumb grin plastered on his face, rolled his neck and raised his fists.
"Hah! Get ready, cactus freak! I'm not holding back!"
Across from him stood Spike o Sensei.
The massive 10-meter-tall cactus didn't budge. Not a twitch. Not a sound. His straw hat drooped lazily over his top thorn. His arms remained still, as always — because Spike o Sensei had never moved a single time in his life.
Didn't matter. Everyone knew. He didn't have to.
The 4 idiots started placing bets. Grimmjow yawned. Aizen gave a quiet woof and Kukkapūro barked twice from atop his head.
Yammy let out a battle cry.
"RAAAH!! DIE, CACTUS!!"
He charged, sand exploding under his feet as he brought his massive fist back for a strike that could crater a Menos Grande.
And then — it happened.
CLONK.
Yammy tripped.
His foot caught a stray hollow skull half-buried in the sand. The giant adjuchas flailed like a drunken mammoth, his momentum too heavy to stop. His face slammed directly into one of Spike's lower thorns.
The entire Bone Circle went silent.
Spike still hadn't moved. Not even a tremble.
Yammy, on the other hand, went limp and dropped face-first into the sand. A huge lump already forming on his forehead. His ass sticking comically in the air.
I threw my head back and let out a roaring guttural howl of laughter.
"GRUOHHAAHAHAAA!!"
Baraggan translated between snickers.
"He says… Yammy lost in one second. What a legend."
The 4 idiots howled, literally rolling in the sand. Grimmjow doubled over, clutching his stomach. Even Aizen gave a series of impressed woofs, while Kukkapūro barked happily and wagged his tiny tail.
Yammy groaned.
"Ugh… what… what happened?"
I grinned and stomped over to him.
"GRUUAH!"
[Translation:You lost to the mightiest warrior in Hueco Mundo history. Bow before Spike o Sensei.]
Baraggan smirked.
"He says you lost. And now you gotta admit Spike is the king here."
Yammy groaned again and lifted a hand.
"I… I admit it… stupid cactus…"
Another guttural laugh escaped me, and I felt it — that familiar warm glow inside. The rush of power when you do something impossibly dumb.
+15,000 EP
I pumped a fist in the air.
"GRUAAAHAA!!"
[Translation:Another glorious idiot victory!!]
The Bone Circle gathered around the fallen Yammy and the unmoving Spike o Sensei, already retelling the battle like it was some epic historic event.
Hueco Mundo was chaos. And I loved it.
Current EP: 85,12,000 / 100,000,000.