Hueco Mundo's eternal night stretched over the white dunes like always — nothing but dead wind and an empty sky. I was bored. Bored enough to go on a little adventure with Aizen, my loyal idiot-dog.
I don't know how or why, but a lost Shinigami had wandered into Hueco Mundo. Alone. No backup. No sense of direction.
A death wish.
Me and Aizen spotted him first, crouched behind a dead tree trunk made of bone.
Aizen gave a soft woof.
I didn't know what it meant, but it probably meant 'let's eat him' or 'dibs on his sandals.'
I leaned close to Aizen.
"GRAAAURGH."
[Translation: We stalk him, see what kind of idiot gets lost in a place like this.]
Aizen wagged his metaphorical tail.
We followed him. The Shinigami stumbled through the dunes, muttering to himself.
"W-Where the hell am I…? C-Captain?! Hello?!"
Aizen gave a soft woof.
I whispered again.
"GRAAAAHHHRR."
[Translation: This one's dumber than Ggio Vega.]
We crept closer, careful to stay out of sight. Aizen's footsteps were soundless. Mine… not so much.
Sand crunched. Bones cracked.
The Shinigami spun around, drawing his sword.
"Who's there?!"
Aizen woofed.
The Shinigami looked confused.
"Was… was that a dog?"
I let out a low rumbling growl.
"GRAAHRRR."
[Translation: You're dead, idiot.]
But I didn't attack yet. No, no. I had a better idea.
While the fool panicked, dropping his sword and falling into the sand, I lunged forward and ripped the Hakama off his legs.
Aizen dashed in behind me and — with a surprising bit of grace — bit down on the guy's Kosode and tore it free, leaving the poor Shinigami half-naked and screaming in terror.
"AAAH! MY CLOTHES!"
Aizen gave a proud woof, trotting away with the Kosode clenched in his teeth like some prize-winning trophy.
I held up the Hakama like it was some ancient treasure.
"GRAAAAHHHHRRR!"
[Translation: Now I look like a captain!]
The Shinigami bolted off into the distance, white sand kicking up behind him as he disappeared into the gloom.
Aizen and I sat there, admiring our loot.
I stuffed the Hakama over one shoulder. It barely fit me — too small.
Aizen wrapped the Kosode around his neck like a scarf. It looked stupid. But kind of noble. In a dumb way.
+15,000 EP right at the start for tracking the idiot.
+11,000 EP when I pulled that genius move with the Hakama.
New Total EP: 74,867,000 / 100,000,000.
Almost there.
Almost.