Kazuya woke up with two problems.
The first: he couldn't feel his legs. Ishtar was sprawled over him like a luxury comforter that refused to get out of bed. Ereshkigal, on the other hand, had turned his right arm into her personal pillow, hugging it with the determination of someone who would lose a war but wouldn't let go of that arm.
The second problem: he was grinning like a complete idiot.
The kind of grin anyone would have after spending the night between two enamored goddesses. Not just any goddesses, of course—we're talking about Ishtar and Ereshkigal. The former was pure fire, boldness, and provocation with a classic tsundere touch. The latter, an irresistible mix of sweetness and intensity. And somehow, both had decided that Kazuya was worthy of all that devotion...
He stretched slowly, careful not to move too much and wake them, and stared at the bedroom ceiling with a recurring thought:
"I was absolutely insatiable last night."
The weirdest part? He wasn't exaggerating. It was as if a source of energy had activated inside him and refused to shut off. Every touch, every kiss, every sigh from the two only fueled something within him—not just desire, but something more primal, instinctive.
"Could this be because I'm a dragon?" he wondered, furrowing his brows. Or was it due to having unlimited magical energy? It wasn't absurd to consider, given that mana transfer between mages, or masters and servants, often happened through sex. Or was it due to some reason he didn't know? Maybe he was just like that?
And as strange as it was, he didn't think it was a bad thing.
Ishtar's breathing deepened, and she snuggled into his neck with a satisfied sound. Ereshkigal mumbled something that sounded like "I want to stay like this forever," her eyes still closed.
Kazuya sighed and smiled again. Maybe he was indeed changing. With the delicacy of an archaeologist trying to remove a millennial relic without triggering deadly traps, he began to move.
First, the arm.
Ereshkigal mumbled something incoherent and hugged tighter, making Kazuya hold his breath as if he'd just entered stealth mode in in a stealth game. With some finesse, he pulled his arm free from the underworld goddess's embrace. She grumbled but didn't wake up.
Now... the legs.
Ishtar was practically melted over him, one leg thrown between his and her face buried in his shoulder. Kazuya swore that if he tried to get out too quickly, she'd activate her Noble Phantasm on reflex. With movements calculated to the millimeter, worthy of a hardcore gamer trying to pull an SSR from a banner with a 0.7% chance, he slid out of bed like a ninja.
Feet on the floor. Bodies still sleeping. Mission accomplished.
He stretched fully, completely naked, letting out a long, victorious sigh, as if he'd just won a legendary battle.
"Alright... new survival record."
He walked around the room. Picked up a pair of light pants from the floor and put them on, his gaze scanning the details. Clothes scattered, pillowcases tossed on the floor, a handprint on the wall (don't ask), and a strong scent of... well, sex.
He wrinkled his nose.
"This place is more saturated than Merlin's banner on my credit card..."
He mentally noted: clean the room before nightfall.
He headed to the kitchen, hair still messy, feeling his muscles slightly tired (which, let's be honest, wasn't a complaint). Glancing at the clock on the wall, he let out a grumble.
"Half an hour until school... Why do isekai authors never show this?"
He opened the fridge, grabbed eggs, yesterday's rice, and some sliced ham. The classic quick fried rice. The pan sizzled on the stove as he stirred the ingredients with one hand and held a water bottle with the other.
His mind wandered. Not to what happened between him, Ishtar, and Ereshkigal—that was still too fresh, like a game you finish and sit through the credits trying to process. But to what was coming.
He still had classes.
He still had to pretend to be a normal student.
He still had to hide the fact that he'd summoned two goddesses from the Mesopotamian world and that they'd decided the status of "girlfriend" was insufficient for what they felt for him.
And, of course, he still had gacha to roll.
"I need coffee for this," he muttered, tossing the fried rice onto a plate and grabbing a mug.
In the living room, he could still hear the soft sound of Ishtar and Ereshkigal's breathing. A reminder that his life was no longer normal... and that, as chaotic as it was, he wouldn't trade it for anything.
"Time to face the day. And, if possible, without anyone finding out I'm the protagonist of a five-star ecchi anime," he grumbled, carrying the plate to the table.
And he started eating, because, as any gacha player knows, an empty stomach only brings bad luck.
Kazuya sat at the table with the calm of someone who knew they'd survived a divine storm—literally. With the fried rice steaming on the plate and the coffee mug strategically placed to the right (priorities, right?), he took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a second.
"This... This is the pinnacle of isekai."
He wasn't just talking about the two mythological goddesses still sprawled in bed like fans in a post-K-pop concert coma. He meant the fact that he had hot fried rice, decent coffee, a secret double life, and... a daily chance to pull SSRs through his unique ability.
His gaze fell on the floating panel only he could see—one of the side effects of his unique skill: **[Fate Gacha]**.
*Plim.*
**[Saint Quartz: 9/100 (daily recharge)]**
**[Would you like to perform a summon? [Yes / No]]**
Kazuya gave a smile that could only be described as a cross between "otaku on a Black Friday figure sale" and "gacha addict about to defy the odds." He took a bite of rice, chewed slowly, and murmured with reverence:
"Great RNG-sama... I know I complained when I got three Gilles de Rais in a row, but today... today I beg, bless me."
With a mental tap on the "Yes" button, the panel glowed.
The lights spun like an idol show in Las Vegas. Magic circles danced, golden particles rose. Kazuya's heart raced.
**[You received: Golden Rule - Rank EX (Gilgamesh)]**
*CLINK.*
The fork fell onto the plate. Kazuya blinked.
"...Hold on."
He blinked again.
"...Hold on."
The panel didn't change. He rubbed his eyes. Still there.
"I... I got... Gil's passive?"
Gilgamesh. The King of Heroes. The most ostentatious, extravagant, filthy rich, and egocentric king in human history. The one who'd look at the Central Bank's vault and say, "What a cute little piggy bank, I'll give it to my dog."
And now, Kazuya had **[Golden Rule - Rank EX]**.
He stood up from the chair, still shirtless, and raised his arms to the ceiling as if thanking the heavens.
"Thank you, Gilgamesh. May your vault never fail, and may your taxes always be paid by others."
A golden glow briefly enveloped his body. The skill activated passively. He could already feel the difference: a piece of wood in the house suddenly fell, revealing a collection of ancient coins worth a fortune; a gold pendant, the only thing his predecessor's parents had left, reappeared in the sink; and an automatic email arrived on his phone with a notification: "Congratulations, you've just inherited a forgotten fortune from a wealthy uncle."
The skill made the universe literally conspire to make him rich, everything would work out, and he'd never be poor again.
"This is what I call a blessed SSR..." he murmured, returning to the table with a smile that made Ishtar look humble.
He sat back down. Picked up the coffee. Took a sip. A satisfied grin spread across his face.
"Now we're talking... now my life as an isekai protagonist has truly begun."
The panel still glowed softly. Two rolls left.
He glanced at it.
"...Should I risk another? Maybe I'll get Gate of Babylon."
And there, between a bite of rice and a sip of coffee, Kazuya realized: he was no longer just an orphan lost in a supernatural world.
He was a rich orphan, with two enamored goddesses, a powerful dragon, with mystic eyes capable of erasing concepts and infinite magical energy. And, of course, he still had math class in 20 minutes. But that was a problem for future him.
"Time for the next roll."
After clicking "Yes," Kazuya was about to take another bite of rice when the floating panel flashed again, a golden light igniting for a second. He swallowed a bit more quickly, feeling a slight tingle at his fingertips. Something was about to happen.
*Plim.*
**[You received: Karna (Santa) Fighting Style Package - Rank EX]**
**[You received: Class Skill: Strong Puncher - Rank EX]**
**[You received: Personal Skill: Foot Santa - Rank EX]**
**[You received: Shining Fist - Rank A]**
The coffee nearly slipped from his hand. Kazuya froze, eyes locked on the panel, unable to believe what he was seeing. He blinked several times, as if trying to force the image to become clearer, but no, the text was there, glowing in an unmistakable golden hue...
He had really gotten Karna's skills?
Karna! One of his favorite Servants. The Indian hero, the demigod with the power to destroy entire armies. The guy who was so insane that even Vishnu himself worried about his power. And now Kazuya was receiving not just one, but MULTIPLE aspects of this guy in his life.
He stood up from the chair, the rice plate forgotten, his eyes gleaming with excitement.
"I... I got... Karna?! The Karna? The guy who fought Arjuna and was practically unbeatable? And with this punching skill? No, this is... this is everything I wanted!"
And, as if reality itself were trying to mess with him, Kazuya's body seemed to adjust somehow. He couldn't see it physically, but he felt it. His fists felt heavier yet faster, as if a new strength were being channeled into them, while memories of the fighting style were imprinted in his mind. He threw a punch into the air without realizing, but the movement was so smooth, so precise, it felt like he was dancing in the air.
"Damn, this is surreal! I'm basically Karna with a touch of... Santa?" Kazuya laughed at the irony. "I don't even know where to start. This 'Foot Santa'... It's gotta be something amazing, right? Or maybe it's just me trying to hand out presents in the middle of a fight."
He looked at his fists, still in disbelief.
"Shining Fist... Okay, this is gonna be great for anyone I hit, isn't it? At the speed of light? I feel like I'm about to become a blur of punches and destruction."
And then, as if his skill had a mind of its own, a wave of energy enveloped him. He could almost see the golden trails of Karna's punches in his mind, the speed and strength of each blow so powerful he almost believed he could destroy the world with a single punch.
With a mischievous grin, he paused, imagining where he could test this. Of course, he knew he wasn't going to go around beating people up. That's not how things worked, but the idea of having such power within him was enough to make anyone ecstatic.
Kazuya sat back down, the smile on his face growing wider by the second.
He looked at the panel again; his last roll was still available.
"Let's see what else RNG-sama has for me. Maybe some magic? Or perhaps a new skill to rule the world?"
He chuckled softly and gave the next mental tap, the golden glow spreading again.
Kazuya's finger barely touched the panel when the golden glow erupted again, more intense this time, almost as if the gacha itself knew something extraordinary was about to happen. The screen trembled, displaying a new message in elegant letters, embroidered with ethereal threads of purple magic:
**[You received: Servant Summon - Shuten-douji (Assassin)]**
For a second, time seemed to stop.
Kazuya froze, his wide eyes locked on the text as if it had just shown the alternate ending he'd programmed into the mods of *Fate/Grand Order* in his past life, that forbidden Rashoumon ending where he and Shuten ended in a drunken climax of desire one night of pleasure, followed by a tragic and passionate reunion in Shimosa.
His breath caught in his chest.
And then, the room's atmosphere changed.
The air grew heavy, sweet, and intoxicating. The scent of poisonous flowers and sake filled the space like an ethereal breeze from another world. A soft sound, almost like a whispered laugh, echoed from the corners, seductive, treacherous, addictive.
A crack of purple energy opened in the floor, leaking a spectral glow. And from it emerged a small, slender silhouette... a glassy blue glint on the blade resting in her right hand... a red lantern in the other, with the kanji for "drunk" glowing like an omen.
Her steps were slow, graceful, not out of shyness, but out of pleasure. Pleasure in being watched. Her purple eyes sparkled when they saw him. Those same eyes that had once fixed on him under Kyoto's moonlight, after hours of sharing drinks, promises, and secrets. Those eyes still carried the same hunger, the same crimson memory of what they'd done under Rashoumon's veil...
"Ufufufu... ah, what nostalgia, anata..." Her voice was sweet poison, dripping with lust and malice as her lips curved into a languid smile. "You called me... again. You're teasing me, aren't you?"
She was exactly as he remembered in her third ascension: the purple kimono shortened to the waist, generously displaying her pale, shimmering lilac skin; the horns flowing smoothly from her forehead like macabre wine branches; the golden ornament gleaming on her brow. The gourds at her waist swayed with her movements, and the fangs...
Kazuya swallowed hard. His fingers trembled, and it wasn't from fear.
She approached. The ribbons on her ankles danced with her silent steps as she raised her free hand and brushed two cold fingers against his chin.
"How could I forget... that warmth, that night, that taste..." She licked her lips. "The flavor of your blood mixed with wine. The way you moaned my name as the world collapsed..."
Kazuya blushed violently, nearly stumbling backward.
"H-Hey, hold on! There's people in the house!"
He glanced at the bedroom door as if it might explode at any moment.
Shuten just laughed, amused by his embarrassment. That laugh, like infernal bells on a summer night, beautiful and terrifying at once.
"Ufufu... how cute. Even now, you're the same. But..." She slid her finger down his shirt, stopping over his chest. "Don't fool me. I can feel it. You still want me. Right here."
Heat exploded down Kazuya's spine. Part of him wanted to argue. Another part... just wanted to pull her closer. It was her. That insane creature he'd saved and loved, even when everyone said there was nothing human in her.
Shuten sighed, as if holding herself back too. "You called me again, so... this time, anata... can I have you all to myself? Just a little?"
Kazuya took a deep breath, trying to contain the avalanche of emotions and memories. "If it's just a little..."
She smiled. A smile that mixed tenderness and threat, desire and madness. The kind of smile only an enamored oni could give.
Then she sat on his lap with the ease of someone who'd done it before, wrapping one arm around his neck like a lazy snake, resting her head on his shoulder.
"...Anata...?"
The whisper escaped like a prayer. Her purple eyes flickered, hesitated, then widened in prolonged silence, as if the sight before her were a miracle... or a ghost.
"You... died."
Her voice, once laced with drunken malice, now sounded stripped of masks. It was raw. Fragile. Pure. And soon after, a trembling laugh escaped her lips. "Hahaha... what a cruel trick of the gods, isn't it?"
She looked at him again, her eyes tracing every detail of his new appearance: the snow-white hair, the eyes glowing with an unreal blue, the physique sculpted like a demigod among monsters.
She licked her lips, not with vulgar desire, but with instinctive reverence, like a priestess before a forbidden altar.
"You... are different. More beautiful than ever. More... dangerous." She touched his chest, her fingers light, almost in prayer. "But it's still you. I feel it. Here."
Shuten's cold fingers slid from Kazuya's chin to his lips, the tip brushing softly against the curve of his lower lip. Her breath, laden with the sweet and lethal scent of night flowers and a subtle hint of sake, grazed his face.
"...Anata..." she whispered again, her voice heavy with palpable emotion. Her purple eyes, once filled with playful malice, now shimmered with a nostalgic, almost painful intensity.
Kazuya felt his body react instinctively. The heat radiating from her was undeniable. He raised his hand, hesitant, and touched her pale cheek. Her skin was cold as marble, but the electricity it emitted was incandescent.
Shuten closed her eyes for a brief moment, inhaling his scent deeply. A small moan escaped her parted lips.
"Your smell... it's still the same. But... stronger. More... addictive."
Then, without warning, she leaned in and pressed her lips against his.
The initial touch was hesitant, almost a test. But soon, the oni's possessiveness took over. Her mouth opened over his, her tongue slipping inside with surprising familiarity, as if years hadn't passed.
Kazuya let out a soft moan, the initial shock giving way to a wave of heat and overwhelming memories. Her taste was exactly as he remembered: an intoxicating mix of floral sweetness and a wild, almost metallic edge. It was a flavor that had bewitched him once and seemed ready to do so again.
He responded to the kiss with restrained intensity. His own tongue met hers, dancing in a rhythm they both seemed to recall on a cellular level. Longing, lust, and a hint of desperation mingled in that contact.
Shuten let out a throaty sound, tightening her arms around his neck. The kiss deepened, becoming more urgent, hungrier. She seemed to want to absorb every particle of him, as if afraid he'd vanish again.
Her small, slender body pressed against his, every curve fitting as if they were made for each other. Kazuya could feel the tremor running through her, the ragged breath escaping between her lips.
Her kiss tasted even more intense than she remembered. It was like tasting forbidden nectar that had once bewitched her. Every touch of his tongue awakened vivid memories of wild nights of passion, hoarse whispers, and bodies entwined under the moonlight.
A louder moan escaped Shuten's lips as Kazuya's tongue explored the depths of her mouth, finding sensitive spots she barely remembered existed. It was a taste that reignited an ancient fire within her, a piercing longing for that warmth, that intimacy she thought she'd lost forever.
She pressed her lips harder against his, as if trying to trap him in that moment. The world around them seemed to fade, leaving only the wet heat of their joined mouths, their panting breaths, and the silent echo of a shared past and a desire that stubbornly refused to die.
Kazuya pulled her closer, deepening the kiss even further, matching her hunger with his own. It was as if time had bent, bringing back the intensity of that first encounter in the Rashoumon event. He could feel her racing pulse against his chest, the tremor in her lips, the way she clung to him as if he were her only anchor in the world.
The kiss intensified, their breathing growing faster and shallower. Shuten felt his body tense beneath her, the heat radiating through the thin layer of his pants.
And then, she noticed.
The unmistakable hardness pressing against her groin. A firm, pulsing bulge that reminded her, undeniably, of the raw, visceral intimacy they'd shared. His erection, large and insistent, brushed softly against her with every subtle movement of their bodies joined in the kiss.
Shuten's purple eyes widened slightly, a mischievous and lascivious glint beginning to replace the melancholic nostalgia. A small smile curved her lips as she pulled back just enough to break the seal of their mouths, but kept their bodies pressed together.
A hot sigh brushed Kazuya's lips.
"Ufufu... seems someone's... excited about the reunion." Her voice was a whisper laced with double entendre, her eyes fixed on his with playful intensity. She shifted her hips slightly, just enough to intensify the contact and feel his firmness even more clearly.
Kazuya swallowed hard, his face flushing even more. He could feel the heat rising through his body, electricity coursing through every nerve. Her proximity, the taste of her lips, the undeniable awareness of his desire... it all combined into a wave of almost painful arousal.
He tried to speak, but all that came out was an unintelligible murmur.
Shuten laughed softly, a sound that vibrated against his lips. She tilted her head, her horns brushing gently against his face.
"No need to say anything, anata. Your body's already speaking for you." She pressed her hips again, a bit more lingeringly this time, feeling his immediate response. A small moan escaped her lips, not from pain, but from perverse pleasure and the tactile memory of passionate nights.
"I remember well... this... 'excitement' of yours." She licked her lips, her eyes locked on his with a silent promise. "It was always... so... insistent. Though it seems much bigger now than before... I'm afraid it might break me."
She moved her hips again, the friction soft but undeniable, sending even hotter waves through Kazuya's body. He clenched his fists, fighting to maintain control as the mischievous oni played with his senses, then she kissed him again, trying to capture his tongue with her playful one.
The kiss seemed to last an eternity. And honestly? Kazuya wasn't complaining. If that were his last breath in the mortal world, drowning in the lips of the most dangerous and absurdly beautiful oni in Japanese history didn't seem like a bad way to go.
But then...
*TRIIIIIMMMMM!*
His phone buzzed and blared with the most annoying alarm tone in the world, straight from the school app.
Kazuya froze.
"...No."
Shuten pulled back slightly, confused, licking her lips in a lascivious and lazy manner. "Hm? What's wrong, anata? Finally ran out of breath?"
Kazuya looked at the phone. Then at the door. Then back at the phone, as if he could curse it into exploding.
"I have class in fifteen minutes."
His tone was that of a man who'd just remembered he left ramen on the stove and the apartment was on fire.
Shuten blinked.
"...Class?" she repeated, the word sounding more like an insult than anything else. Information about this world had been imprinted in fragments in her mind, with emphasis on the era, so she knew what her beloved master was referring to.
"Yes, class. School. Human education system." He ran his hands over his face and muttered, "Why the hell did I pick 'Cosmochemistry Survey' as an elective?!"
"But..." Shuten purred, pressing her hips lightly against him again, "I just came back to you, anata. You died. I returned to the Throne. And you're going to leave me... for a... class?"
Her voice was a seductive pout, laced with dangerous promises.
Kazuya grabbed her by the shoulders and pushed her back a bit, which, by the way, was harder than facing a Gawain fight with a sun buff.
"Shuten, I swear by Gabriel's shriveled breasts or Odin's saggy balls, we'll... pick this up later. Slowly. And maybe with sake. But right now, I need to be at school in fourteen minutes..."
The oni crossed her arms, puffing out her cheeks like a spoiled child. A jealous glint sparkled in her eyes.
"You summoned them first, didn't you?"
Kazuya froze mid-motion as he stood, deliberately avoiding looking at the bed behind him.
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"Anata..." Shuten leaned in, her eyes gleaming like knives dipped in venomous nectar. "Those two Mesopotamian goddesses are lying in that bed. Sleeping. Like two satisfied brides. I can smell them."
Kazuya glanced over his shoulder and, indeed, there were the two Mesopotamian goddesses, asleep among the sheets, with angelic expressions (a miracle, considering who they were).
He turned back to Shuten, who looked quite jealous.
Kazuya took a deep breath.
A very deep breath.
The kind of breath an anime protagonist takes before jumping off a cliff, trusting in the power of friendship or, in his case, the power of an improvised excuse.
"Look... Shuten," he began, his voice carrying the tone of someone who'd already lost before even trying. "I don't have full control over my summoning ability, okay? They just... came."
Shuten stared at him. Not like she was listening, but like she was deciding whether to sink her teeth or claws in first. The venom in her words wasn't even necessary; her gaze already promised a slow, probably extremely sensual death.
"Came... first..." she repeated, with a smile as sweet as a freshly sharpened knife dipped in honey.
"Yes! But that doesn't mean anything! I'll still make it up to you, okay? Like... a lot. Really a lot. I can reserve a whole weekend just for us. A trip! Or maybe I'll cook something. You like takoyaki, right? I can buy octopus. Live. Just to put on a show."
She narrowed her eyes.
"You think food will buy me?"
"No, but... maybe if I grab you like this..." Kazuya, gripping her firmly by the thighs and lifting her into the air with surprising ease. Shuten let out a surprised and clearly pleased giggle before being spun and gently set down where he'd been sitting, like an exotic work of art being put on display.
She let out a small sigh, a mix of surprise and pleasure, crossing one leg over the other as if trying to hide the victorious smile forming.
"You're good with your hands, anata," she murmured, eyes half-closed. "But I'm still deciding if I'll let you go..."
"I'll be back after three," he said, already backing away carefully, like someone retreating from a lion's cage with a steak strapped to their back. "I promise. And after that, you'll see what a date worthy of a legendary oni looks like."
Shuten followed him with her eyes as he walked to the bedroom, grabbing his pants and the Kuoh uniform shirt. As he dressed with the agility of a late ninja, she sat there, a perfect vision of beauty, danger, and pure possessiveness, something he noticed when he returned and passed through the kitchen toward the exit. He just swallowed hard, buttoned his shirt, and mentally cursed himself for every time he'd said "I want all the waifus" in his gacha life. Now he had access to all of them. And he was about to die for it. Or worse... become their butler.
Bidding Shuten farewell, he quickly left the house.