Chapter 45: Where the Sun Caught Her Eyes
It was the kind of morning that painted the world in gold—gentle and glowing, the warmth barely brushing the stones of the Ainsley estate. The second-floor window seat, wrapped in gauzy curtains and overstuffed cushions, had long since become Eva's favorite perch. She didn't know how to explain it—not even to herself—but every morning for nearly a month, she found herself drawn back to that same spot.
From there, she could see the Langford garden just beyond the trimmed hedgerow and the wrought iron fence. But what she truly watched, with the quiet patience of a child who didn't yet know the word longing, was the girl who danced through that garden like a flicker of sunlight given form.
Seraphina.
Eva had learned her name from a passing conversation between Evelyn and one of the neighbors. Seraphina Langford. A year or five years older than Eva, tall for her age, with long dark pale auburn lashes and hair that shimmered gold in the sun like silk threads. She always seemed to wear the light itself, as though the sky couldn't bear to let her go.
That morning, Seraphina was wearing a pale green dress, her hair caught back with a pink ribbon. She skipped through the yard barefoot, twirling a flowering branch in her hand like a wand, her laughter ringing clear across the garden. Eva pressed her hands to the window, cheeks smushed softly against the glass. Her breath fogged a little circle, and she absently rubbed it away with the sleeve of her cream cotton dress.
She didn't know why her heart felt jumpy whenever Seraphina laughed. She didn't know why her chest warmed at the sight of her twirling through flowerbeds. She just knew that when Seraphina was out, the whole world felt lighter.
"Still watching the fairy girl?" came a familiar voice, amused and lilting.
Eva startled and spun around, heart leaping into her throat. Vivienne leaned casually against the hallway arch, arms folded, one brow arched in quiet mischief.
"I—no," Eva said, far too quickly. She turned a brilliant shade of pink.
Vivienne laughed. "Oh, yes. Of course not. You're just observing the state of the hedges. For scholarly purposes."
"I'm not!" Eva hid her face in her small hands, muffling her voice. "I was just looking."
Vivienne crossed the room in three soft steps and crouched beside her. "You've been 'just looking' for weeks now, darling. I think we can safely call it what it is."
Eva peeked through her fingers. "What… what is it?"
Vivienne tapped her nose. "A crush. A tiny one. The gentlest, sunniest kind."
Eva groaned and dropped her hands. "Don't say that."
"I'm sorry," Vivienne said with mock seriousness. "Did I embarrass my favorite girl?"
"Yes!" Eva climbed into Vivienne's arms with a dramatic sigh and buried her face in her shoulder. "Say something else."
"Alright." Vivienne stood, carrying her effortlessly. "You've developed a keen aesthetic appreciation for a fellow neighborhood child whose movement patterns are particularly appealing. How's that?"
"…Better."
Vivienne kissed her temple. "You're a romantic already, you know. You inherited that from Evelyn."
Eva looked up. "What's a romantic?"
"Someone who feels everything a little more than others. Who sees beauty in little things. Who gets all fluttery around a certain someone," Vivienne teased, giving Eva's side a gentle poke.
Eva yelped and squirmed. "Stoppp!"
"I saw the way your ears went red when she skipped past the roses."
"They did not!" Eva insisted, covering her ears with both hands.
"Oh, they did. You looked like a cherry tart." Vivienne laughed and swung her around in her arms, spinning slowly in the hallway. Eva giggled despite herself, and the teasing finally faded into cuddling.
After a few minutes, Eva whispered, "She waved at me yesterday."
Vivienne froze. "She did?"
Eva nodded into her neck. "I was looking through the window again. I thought she wouldn't see me, but she did. And she waved. And I fell off the bench."
Vivienne bit back laughter. "You fell?"
"I panicked!" Eva wailed.
"Oh, sweetheart." Vivienne held her tighter, clearly trying not to giggle. "Did you wave back?"
Eva shook her head miserably. "I ran away."
"Well. She noticed you." Vivienne grinned. "That's progress."
"I wish she didn't." Eva sighed dramatically. "I want to be invisible."
"No, you don't." Vivienne nuzzled her cheek. "You just want her to love you already, without having to say anything scary."
Eva blinked. "She doesn't even know my name."
"Not yet." Vivienne swayed with her. "But one day, she will. And she'll say it like it's made of sunlight."
Eva grew very quiet.
After lunch, while Evelyn and Reginald entertained company in the drawing room, Eva returned to her usual hiding spot—this time in the sunroom, behind the tall drapes. She held her bunny plush close to her chest and peeked out again.
Seraphina was there. Sitting beneath the willow tree at the edge of the Langford lawn, a sketchpad in her lap, pencil dancing lightly across the page. She looked serene. Focused. Beautiful.
Eva didn't realize she was holding her breath.
Until—
Seraphina looked up.
Straight. At. Her.
Eva's soul left her body.
She dropped the curtain and bolted out of the room, plush bunny under one arm, her socks sliding wildly on the polished wood. She didn't stop running until she dove into Vivienne's lap in the library, breathless and horrified.
"She saw me again!" she wailed.
Vivienne burst out laughing. "Oh no! The tragedy continues!"
"She looked at me, aunt Vivi! Like—really looked!"
"And what did you do?"
"I fled. Like a coward." Eva buried her face. "Again."
Vivienne kissed the top of her head. "My little romantic coward."
Eva moaned into her lap. "I'm never going near a window again."
"You say that," Vivienne teased, running her fingers through Eva's curls, "but I give it twenty-four hours before you're back behind the drapes."
Eva sat up with a pout. "I don't like being seen."
"But you do like seeing her."
Eva groaned, melting back into a puddle of snuggles. "Can we not talk about it?"
"Of course." Vivienne kissed her again. "We'll talk about how pink your ears are instead."
"Aunt Vivi!"
Vivienne chuckled and lay down sideways on the couch, pulling Eva with her until they were curled up like spoons. "There. Safe and snuggled. No scary girls looking at you here."
Eva nestled under her chin. "Do you think… maybe… she'll say hi someday?"
Vivienne smiled against her hair. "I think she will. And when she does, I think you'll say hi back."
Eva didn't reply for a long time. Then, softly, "What if I can't?"
"Then I'll be right there," Vivienne promised. "To squeeze your hand and remind you you're braver than you think."
Eva closed her eyes. "You always know what to say."
"It's my job." Vivienne held her tighter. "That, and stealing your kisses."
"You don't steal them. I give them."
"Oh?" Vivienne looked down. "May I have one now?"
Eva sat up, solemn, and kissed her cheek. "For protection."
Vivienne smiled. "Against Seraphina?"
"Against myself."
Vivienne's arms curled around her again. "You're doing beautifully, Eva. You're learning how to want things. That's not easy."
Eva laid her head back down and said nothing, but her tiny hand slipped into Vivienne's, and she didn't let go for a long time.