After dinner, Lu Chen sat on the sofa with the two gods, watching TV.
As usual, Raiden Ei switched to her favorite cooking show, where a cheerful celebrity chef was demonstrating how to make a simple egg fried rice.
"You just ate. Why are you watching this again?" Venti asked in confusion.
Raiden Ei shot him a glance but didn't respond. No way she was going to admit she'd been secretly trying to learn how to cook.
If he found out, he'd never stop asking questions—and he'd definitely hear about the time she blew up the kitchen...
Way too embarrassing.
Since she didn't answer, Venti raised an eyebrow, unable to figure out why Raiden Ei had suddenly gone cold.
"Cooking shows are boring. I wanna watch a musical!"
"No."
"I want to watch a musical!"
"I don't like them."
"Keep it down, you two..." Lu Chen gestured for silence. He was on the phone with Zhang Zikai.
As expected, Zhang Zikai worked fast. He'd already followed up on the music teacher situation.
Like the athletics department, Haizhou Academy had a music division for students with special talents. With over ten specialized instructors, their staff was strong.
Music exams were split into instrumental and vocal tracks. Instrumental involved playing various instruments, and vocal was focused on singing.
Venti excelled at both, but Lu Chen felt he was a better fit for instrumental music.
He still vividly remembered how Venti once played the Skyward Harp to calm Dvalin.
Zhang Zikai brought good news: one of the instrumental instructors had fallen ill and was hospitalized. The school needed a temporary substitute.
While the role was likely a temp position with no formal appointment, if Venti could get hired, it would still fulfill the task.
So, whether the task was completed would all depend on Venti's performance.
Lu Chen ended the call, turned to the two gods, and sighed helplessly.
The TV kept switching between the chef making fried rice and a flashy musical number, as the two of them fought over the remote.
The poor remote floated mid-air, caught in an Anemo tug-of-war—one second near Venti, the next snatched away by a flash of purple light. Back and forth...
"Cooking shows are so dull. What's the appeal?"
"If you love music so much, go play it in your room."
"Nope! I'm watching the musical."
"You do know whose house this is, right?"
"Isn't it Lu Chen's place? What, are you trying to act like the lady of the house? Lu Chen invited me here. He needed me!"
"..."
Neither of them backed down.
Then came a loud snap—the remote broke in two.
They locked eyes for a second, then slowly turned to look at Lu Chen.
The air went still.
"..."
Lu Chen silently picked up the broken remote and handed each of them a half.
"There. Now you each have one."
"Ahaha..." Venti scratched his head awkwardly.
Raiden Ei looked away, lips pressed tight.
"You're a combined 6,000 years old. Can you not act like toddlers?"
Both gods stared up at Lu Chen from the sofa like elementary schoolers getting scolded.
He could hardly believe it. Fighting over a TV remote? Truly ridiculous.
Maybe he really should buy another TV tomorrow...
Would save them from battling over it again.
Lu Chen gathered the remains of the remote and walked over to the TV to change channels manually.
Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the two of them staring at him, eyes full of anticipation.
Finding it amusing, he switched the channel to SpongeBob SquarePants.
Now neither of them could enjoy it—perfectly fair.
On-screen, SpongeBob and Patrick were tormenting Squidward. When Lu Chen glanced back, both gods were staring in disbelief.
"Break time's over." He sat down between them and relayed the info Zhang Zikai had shared.
Venti furrowed his delicate brows. "I see. So I just need to apply to be a substitute teacher?"
"That's right. But are you sure you can handle the job?"
Venti broke into a smug grin. "As the world's greatest bard, is there any music or poem I can't master? Just tell me—what class do they want me to teach?"
Lu Chen thought for a moment. "The teacher who got sick taught instrumental music."
"Oh? Perfect!" Venti asked again, "What instrument specifically?"
"It's..."
"Hmm?"
Lu Chen sighed. "Percussion. Specifically—a drum set."
"Drums?" Venti blinked, surprised.
Lu Chen nodded. He could already picture Venti going wild on a drum kit.
It was almost too easy to imagine.
He'd have preferred it if the teacher had taught harp, but beggars couldn't be choosers. For now, Venti would just have to pound the drums.
"Drums..." Venti mused. He thought he'd seen something like that earlier at Starlight Entertainment.
"Don't worry. Leave it to me." He gave another confident nod.
Lu Chen returned it. He didn't doubt Venti's learning ability—only whether he'd pick it up before the original teacher got discharged.
Though, come to think of it... maybe he could "convince" that teacher to take their time recovering...
All set, then.
...
Since he'd promised Zhang Zikai, Lu Chen took him to the beach after school the next day as a thank-you for the intel.
"I usually walk Ei home after school, but today it's all for you," Lu Chen said, casting a side glance, hoping Zhang Zikai would feel properly grateful for this "huge favor."
Zhang Zikai scratched his head, embarrassed. "Sorry for interrupting your time together... Thanks! I'll treat you and Ei to a feast next time!"
"Good to know."
It might seem like Zhang Zikai needed him, but Lu Chen also needed to befriend someone with inside knowledge of the school.
Who knows when the system might glitch again and throw him another impossible task?
The elemental energy by the beach had grown much denser, and breathing it in reminded Lu Chen a little of being back in Teyvat.
With the energy intensifying, the monsters appearing here had also grown stronger.
Like the Slimes wriggling in front of him—they were now at Lv15, with more health and higher attack.
They'd only been Lv10 when he first ran into them.
At this rate, it wouldn't be surprising to see overworld bosses soon. Hydro Mimics had already shown up before... could an Oceanid be next?
On the remote, deserted tidal flats, Zhang Zikai was seeing real "monsters" for the first time.
Even though they were just little blobs, they still looked kinda cute...
"Whoa, it's the legendary Slimes!" His chuunibyou side activated, and he whipped out a baseball bat from who-knows-where, pointing at them dramatically. "Do they shoot corrosive slime? Devour humans? Let out some kind of unspeakable sound?"
Hydro Slimes didn't have powers like that. Was he even talking about Slimes anymore?
The Slimes spotted them and began bouncing toward Zhang Zikai, wide-eyed and round-bodied, looking almost harmless.
Lu Chen gave Zhang Zikai, who clearly had his guard down, a cautionary glance, all while reviewing Hydro Slime attack patterns in his head.
"They don't shoot acid slime, but they do..."
"They do what?"
"They'll jump and slam into you."
"Huh?" Zhang Zikai scoffed. "That's it?"
Among the bouncing Slimes, one was much larger than the others—easily bigger than the other three combined. Lu Chen's eyes narrowed slightly.
Zhang Zikai was still smirking—until that oversized Slime launched itself through the air.
Too fast!
A scream rang out as Zhang Zikai was sent flying.