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Chapter 93 - Chapter 93 – The Temple, The Test, and the Titty Trap

Location: Temple of the Unnamed, Inner Wastes of Ka'rath'Mar

Time: [Resurrection Status: Unclear / Dignity: MIA]

Ren knocked on the temple door.

Just once.

BOOM.

A silent pulse of pressure hit him in the chest like a truck made of air and regret.

He stumbled back. Blinked.

Nothing was there.

REN (blinking):

"…Okay. Not creepy at all."

Then he looked down.

His body was still standing.

But he was… five feet to the left.

REN (staring at his own corpse):

"Did I just get ghost-punched so hard I skipped ahead of myself?"

Suddenly the door opened—

WHAM.

Arix exploded out of it in full training gear, grinning like she'd just stepped out of a bar fight and a fashion shoot at the same time.

ARIX (grinning):

"Hey, dumbass! You made it!"

She immediately yanked Ren into a hug—

Which became a full-body smother combo.

REN (muffled):

"Blmmmh—Arix—I can't—BOOBS—lungs—air—"

ARIX (cheerful):

"Oh please, you've survived time-implosions.

You can handle a little cleavage."

She finally let go.

Ren gasped like he'd been underwater for three weeks.

REN (coughing):

"You literally just suffocated me back to life."

ARIX (casual):

"Well someone had to fix the death thrust."

She motioned behind him.

Ren turned.

And saw… himself.

Still dead.

REN (staring):

"…Can we fix that or…?"

OLD MAN (suddenly appearing beside them):

"Already did."

Ren screamed.

REN (spinning):

"STOP DOING THAT! You don't get to just exist sideways!"

The Old Man didn't look old.

Not anymore.

He looked about thirty. Maybe.

Tall. Clean-cut. Sharp eyes.

Still wore the same coat, but now it looked like it fit his frame instead of being ten sizes too big.

REN (squinting):

"Wait. What the actual fu—"

OLD MAN (grinning):

"Surprise.

Turns out I age backwards when I'm irritated."

ARIX (nodding):

"Confirmed. He once looked 200 after watching Ren train for ten minutes."

REN:

"I hate how normal that sounds coming from you two."

OLD MAN:

"So… you dodged the thrust."

REN (still rattled):

"By accident."

OLD MAN:

"Good enough. You passed."

REN:

"Passed what?! The 'Die With Style' Olympics?!"

ARIX (laughing):

"Nah, it was just a reflex test.

If you died in your own mind, we'd know you weren't ready."

REN:

"And if I failed?"

OLD MAN:

"We'd send your corpse back in a decorative fruit basket. With a card."

REN (deadpan):

"Nice to know your customer service has a dark sense of humor."

They walked deeper into the temple.

Strange glowing floor panels lit under their steps like lazy fireflies.

REN (looking around):

"...This place gives me whiplash. Is this a temple or a techno sauna?"

ARIX (shrugging):

"Depends who you ask.

Some say it's a training ground.

Some say it's where gods came to throw tantrums.

I just call it home."

OLD MAN (smiling):

"And now, you're here.

Alive-ish.

Still snarky.

So let's talk."

REN (narrowing his eyes):

"About what?"

OLD MAN:

"About what comes next.

But first—tea, sarcasm, and at least one more test you're going to hate."

REN:

"Yay. Childhood trauma with a warm beverage."

They sat.

No lore.

No powers.

Just three lunatics, one table, and a very confused goat watching from the corner.

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