I think I spent more time on the scp file than the actual chapter. It took me a while, so gimme a power stone for my efforts :D
| Rio POV |
I'm still hugging the radioactive war crime.
She's still smug about it.
Ralts is still gone.
And I'm about to get blamed for everything.
Again.
I trudge over to May, who's leaning against a food stall manned by three suspiciously swole Audinos. She's holding a cup of juice. I want to believe it's just juice. She probably spiked it after watching me nearly die of flying-based emotional trauma.
She raises an eyebrow as I approach.
"…Where's Ralts?"
I shrug.
She stares at me.
"…Why aren't you answering?"
I shrug again, a bit more exaggerated, and point to my head
She blinks, puts two and two together, and sighs. "Right. No mental channels when she's not around."
I nod.
She glances around. "And you're not worried about her? I thought you'd be the one freaking out if your girlfriend went missing."
Trishout did not like that comment apparently "She's just joking, I'm not waiting for Chris Hansen to pull up anytime soon..."
Honestly, I think we should be worried about the locals, she'll be fine, if something is about to hurt her she can launch it to orbit.
May sighs harder, like she's considering leaving both me and the dragon in a ditch.
Before she can start pacing, a loud whoosh echoes across the runway. A group of people approach — half lab coats, half combat gear. They look like what would happen if you put an entire professor symposium through a military simulator. Well, at least I don't see an umbrella logo on their clothes...
At least a dozen Pokémon flank them. Alolan Ninetales, Claydol, Espeon, Blissey, Gardevoir, even a Hisuian Braviary.
All of them are already mid-Light Screen.
One guy steps forward. He's got thick glasses, a clipboard, and the dead-eyed look of someone who read our file and immediately regretted having a career.
"You must be May." He doesn't wait for a response. "We're here to contain the dangerous cargo. Please place the extra-dimensional entity gently into the box."
I look at Trishout.
She chirps happily, like we're about to play fetch.
Eh, she'll be fine.
May's eyes widen. "Wait, what—?"
Before she finishes, a group of Alolan Raichus yoink both me and Trishout into what I can only describe as a magic-proof coffin made entirely of reinforced glass, Light Screen layers, and trauma.
Why am I included?! Oh right, interdimensional T-virus...
They slam the lid.
Hisssss.
The air tightens. Lights dim. Alarms beep softly.
Someone outside is mumbling "Keep the energy levels below critical. Shield rotation every thirty seconds. Get the Type: Null buffer prepped."
Well, looks like our poor Null is getting the same treatment... at least I'm not the only one suffering...
Nah, I regret coming here.
I punch at the glass, expecting it to shatter at the slightest touch, IT TANKED IT?! What in the actual hell is this made out of?
"That punch could've sent a Golem flying. This thing didn't even wobble. What's this thing made out of? Ground up master balls?!"
I sit down inside the box, slowly.
Trishout curls up on my lap again.
She yawns.
Then smugly headbutts my chest and closes her eyes like this is the spa now.
May stares through the glass like she's watching a live recording of "Things Not To Touch, Vol. 7."
She sighs.
"Every single time."
I feel the box lift up as it settles onto another platform, it clicks. Hisses. Beeps.
Then it moves.
And I don't mean we're being wheeled. I mean it lifts—airlifted by a hovering Magneton swarm like we're a particularly cursed exhibit in a very illegal science museum.
"This feels like a war crime," I mutter to myself, mostly for emotional stability.
Trishout drools a little on my lap.
Of course she's asleep again.
We're hauled down a massive hallway flanked with glass panels, digital displays, and enough metal plating to qualify as a bunker. May trails beside the box, arms crossed and juice long gone, glaring at me like I'm the reason none of her vacations go smoothly.
Eventually, the doors ahead hiss open and we're rolled into a lab—no, a vault—lined with whiteboards, computer banks, glowing samples of who-knows-what, and at least four professors.
I recognize exactly three of them.
And immediately wish I didn't.
Professor Birch, naturally. Wearing a half-zipped lab coat, a headset, and his usual look of "I have fifteen tabs open in my brain."
Professor Rowan, scowling so hard the gravity increases around him. Guy looks like he bench-presses knowledge and insults weakness.
Professor Oak, smiling politely but with that "I've seen Mewtwo's browser history" gleam in his eyes.
And a fourth one I don't know, typing something on a holographic keyboard while muttering about "dimensional pressure indexes." His tie is glowing. That's not okay.
Birch steps forward as the box lowers to the ground.
"…Well. You're not dead. That's a start."
I give him the most dead-eyed Lucario stare I can manage.
"Sorry about the box," he adds, not sounding even slightly sorry. "We just… didn't want you to explode in the lobby, or make anyone else explode."
Fair enough. Thanks for the vote of confidence.
May clears her throat. "Dad. This is the Charmander-like Pokémon we told you about. The one that got suplexed a tree, screamed in cosmic, and almost nuked a forest."
Trishout yawns in her sleep.
Rowan folds his arms. "Looks docile."
"She is," May says, then points at me. "Well, he had to punch whatever made her feral out of her."
I gesture vaguely, because what else can I do? My telepathic translator is still gone. Unless someone here has Aura Vision™ or Emotional Context Magic, I'm just a mute in a box with a fire lizard.
Oak leans closer to the glass.
"Hmmm… Fascinating. And this... X-energy you told Professor Birch about, are you sure it's not just some other type of Z-energy or a variant byproduct of mega stones?"
I wish... Well, let the professors do their sciency stuff... I have a date with and iv point and an item ticket, gotta love maintenance time renumerations.
Now... what can I possibly boost, Speed again? I can already break the sound barrier if I'm not careful... So, how about some fire power?
Attack_IV: 2 → 3
Attack: 102 → 117
Man, this feeling will never get old...
Now, DRUMROLL PLEASE! GIMME A CHOICE BAND!
Oh, I get a plinko machine this time? Wait, Why is it designed like this? There's only one ball and it doesn't matter where it lands, there's only one chute... Eh, just means I can't lose, I hope...
I watch the ball fall out and crack open, revealing a... a scarf? A silk scarf?
[New Item: Silk Scarf]
Boosts Normal type damage by 20% and confusion damage by 20%
Incredibly useless to me... Looks cool though, I dig the drip.
"May, where did that scarf come from?"
"Don't mind it, it's better if you ignore anything he does."
"Alright..."
Word COunt: 1159
ACCESSING FILE…
SCP-8604
Alias: "The Suplex Solution"
Object Class:
Provisional Thaumiel-E(Pending reclassification to Keter or XK-Class should SCP-8604's emotional instability escalate beyond acceptable parameters.)
Special Containment Procedures:
SCP-8604 is to be contained within a reinforced containment unit lined with multiple Light Screens and insulated against psychic interference. All containment furniture must be replaced with unbreakable equivalents every 48 hours or upon destruction, whichever comes first.
Access to any scarf-based artifacts or Normal-type augmentation devices is strictly forbidden unless authorized by O5 Command.
Psychic liaison SCP-8604-L (See Cross-Reference Entry) is to remain within 30 meters of SCP-8604 during all interactions to facilitate communication and emotional regulation.
In the event of an emotional surge or containment breach, emergency lockdown protocols with full containment team deployment are to be enacted immediately.
Description:
SCP-8604 is a humanoid-like organism exhibiting several anomalous traits including, but not limited to, a profound fear of flying, unpredictable emotional outbursts, and statistically improbable acquisition of rare items (see Incident Log 041-A).
The subject demonstrates extraordinary physical strength, capable of subduing hostile entities through unorthodox methods, colloquially described by Foundation personnel as "suplexing a timeline out of her."
Communication is exclusively telepathic and limited to SCP-8604-L, a small psychic entity attached to SCP-8604. Absence of SCP-8604-L renders the subject mute and prone to exaggerated body language.
Recovery Log: Initial Discovery
Date: [REDACTED]Location: Petalburg Woods, Hoenn Region
SCP-8604 was found unconscious in a shallow ditch, incapacitated due to an unintentional exposure to Sleep Powder discharged by a panicked wild Oddish. The entity had reportedly stepped on the Oddish, triggering its defense mechanism.
Discovery was made by civilian May Birch, daughter of Dr. Birch, who rendered aid and facilitated containment. SCP-8604 showed confusion and mild embarrassment upon recovery, with zero initial hostility.
May Birch has since assumed the role of unofficial handler and liaison.
Psychological Profile:
SCP-8604 exhibits chronic sarcasm and a tendency for self-deprecating humor. Signs of possible post-mortem reincarnation syndrome are noted but unconfirmed.
Emotional stability is strongly linked to the presence of SCP-8604-L; in her absence, the subject's behavior becomes erratic and containment risks increase significantly.
Incident Log 041-A: Item Manifestation Event
During a routine containment procedure, SCP-8604 spontaneously manifested a Silk Scarf (an otherwise unattainable artifact). Subject expressed visible satisfaction despite the item's negligible utility relative to its combat repertoire.
No Normal-type moves were recorded in the subject's arsenal at the time, raising questions regarding the origin of the artifact.
Assigned Researcher Comments:
"It suplexed a timeline out of her." — Dr. Birch
"Why does it look smug with zero Special Defense?" — Dr. Rowan
"I think it's cute!" — [DATA EXPUNGED]
Cross-References:
SCP-8604-T "Trishout" — Dormant Keter-class entity subdued by SCP-8604. Containment partially reliant on SCP-8604's cooperation.
SCP-8604-L "Ralts" — Psychic entity serving as communication and emotional anchor for SCP-8604.
Security Clearance Warning:
Due to SCP-8604's tendency to destroy containment apparatus during emotional fluctuations and to spontaneously generate anomalous artifacts, all personnel interacting with the subject must be equipped with emergency Light Screens and auditory protection.
Personnel are strictly forbidden from referring to SCP-8604 as "adorable" or "cute." Noncompliance will result in prolonged glaring and potential nonlethal psychological harassment.
Addendum:
Continued observation and data collection are underway to evaluate the necessity of reclassifying SCP-8604 as Keter or XK-Class based on emotional stability and artifact generation frequency.