Eli.
It's been an hour since I sunk my canines into my mate's neck, hoping to successfully change her from a human to one of our own. It was all to save her life and mine. So far, it's been hell to watch. She's already had two seizures. Rameriez was surprised, which was unsettling for me. She said she has never seen our saliva take effect so quickly.
She tried to assure me It wasn't a relatively bad thing. This stage in the change is supposedly reached about four hours in. At this rate, she'd complete her change in 6-12 hours as opposed to 24-48. That would be remarkable if it was just a speedy transformation. We can't rule out the possibility of it being a negative response either.
Samantha is still unconscious and in critical condition. The seizure could be a result of her head trauma or her body fighting the change. We wouldn't know until more symptoms appeared. I am hoping for the best but staying positive and being naive are totally different. I watched my brother's mate die at the very end. My relief would only come when I saw her smiling again.
The next hour, more seizures, and a fever of one-hundred and two. She also has what looks like a heat rash spreading across her body. I assume it is the skin irritation Doc spoke of before.
It's the third hour. Her symptoms are pretty much the same. There is no change in her vitals either. My mother came by with Ethan. Ethan seems different, but I am not in a position to care about or question it. They force me to get some fresh air, and I literally mean force me. With the help of Tristian and Gabriel, Ethan drags me out of the room. After making many attempts to break through their barrier and get back in, I give up.
"One hour, go!" Ethan orders.
"Fine, assholes." My wolf surfaces, and I reluctantly leave the hospital.
I will take this opportunity to look for any signs of Alex at the car wreck. The warriors have already retrieved my totaled car and had it taken to the junkyard to scrap it. I told them I would need a new one. I didn't want that shit anymore anyway. It would remind me of this tragedy.
The only things I can find on the road are the phone I bought Samanatha, which was surprisingly not smashed, just dead, and her wallet. No sign of Alex. Defeated, I begin my slow stroll back to the pack. Before I can leave the wreck site, I step on something hard. It crunched beneath my feet. I looked down and instantly shed a few more tears.
Right beneath my feet is one of the action figures Alex brought on the road to keep himself entertained. It is a wrestler, with red and black pants and no shirt. The head is missing, an arm, and a leg as well.
I sit on the ground, holding it tightly in my hands as a new fear resonates in me. If Samantha makes it out ok, how will I tell her about Alex? Will she be the same? Would she blame me? I sigh as I stand again. Time flies by as I find myself searching the grass and road for the pieces of Alex's dismembered toy.
.....
I raise out the dirt, placing the final piece on the action figure. I don't know how much time has passed until I receive the mind link.
"WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU, ELI?!" Tristian's voice screeches painfully in my head.
"Calm the fuck down, just took a little stroll. I frankly remember you and my brother tossing me out on my ass."
"A little stroll?!! It's been three fucking hours!"
"Shit." I look at the watch on my wrist, confirming Tristian's accusation.
"Get back here now, it's Samantha..." The link closes.
"SHIT!"
I shift immediately, holding the action figure between my teeth and run as fast as I can.
I shift back when I'm in the hall of the hospital. As I get closer to her room my running slows into a speedy walk. My heart is slamming in my chest again and I am afraid she will be in worse shape than the first time I came to this room. I walked into the room, with my eyes closed. I slowly open them. As I do they lock on a pair of honey brown ones that light up when they recognize mines.
"Mate." The words spill out of her mouth, and she slaps her hand over her lips in embarrassment. She is still clearly confused as to what is happening.
"Samantha?"
...
Samantha.
I can't tell where I am. Everything is dark. My entire body, even my eyelids feel like a ton of bricks and I can't move for the life of me. I try to open my mouth and scream but even that seems impossible.
What the fuck is going on?
Is this a nightmare?
I try thinking hard to before the darkness.
I remember Alex's third birthday. He goes home with my mom. Jared and Eli arguing. Eli staying over and us...making love.
That last thought makes me flush over. Well, if I could see myself, I'm sure I'd be brighter than a tomato.
Focus Samantha... I tell myself.
My mother drops Alex off in the morning and we set out on a long drive to Eli's pack. I can't remember much after. Did we get there? Did I fall asleep on the drive?
Wait! I remember Alex getting sick and me trying to climb into the back seat to help.
Then...then Eli screamed my name?
That's right. I remember the sound of glass shattering beside me and it is flying between me and Alex. As I reach him, a white light flashes before my eyes and then I end up here.
What the fuck happened?!
Where is Alex?!
Why was Eli screaming and where did all that glass come from?!
Alex?!
I try to yell out into the darkness but again no sound comes out.
Alex?! Alex?!
Eli?!
Suddenly, a stabbing pain spirals through my chest. It feels like a panic attack but a million times worse. I grit my phantom teeth in pain and cry out silently into the nothingness. Shortly, my pain begins to dull down, and my body feels lighter. I feel like I am floating up from the darkness. Until a jolt of pain comes pounding into my chest again, this time in short bursts. I feel like it's dragging me downwards, back towards the dark. With each Jolt, I am lowered.
No! I cry.
The jolt comes repeatedly, and I find myself full of weights again. Stuck like glue to the bottom of this pitch-black pit. All pain seizes to exist now, and I am back to feeling like nothing but dead weight. I pity myself on how close I was to getting out. I don't know where up was, but I was hoping it wasn't this empty.
Moments later, I can feel something again. A random wave of warmth washes over me, and I welcome it embraced. However, the warmth does not come alone. It comes hand in hand with a sting on the left side of my neck. It is brief but leaves behind a slightly burning sensation in its place. The warmth slowly leaves me and the slight burning sensation slithers slowly throughout my body.
.....
I don't know how long it has been, but the burning never went away. Sometimes it feels like it would and other times it intensifies. Oddly enough I welcome it. It is different than the nothingness I was feeling before. It makes me feel alive. The warmth I felt before seems to show up every time the burning is almost unbearable. I want it to always stay. It is calming and reassuring that whatever this is, it will pass and it does.
It is a long while since the warmth was present. At some point the burning converts into a soreness in my body. I can hear a faint rumble almost like a purring in my head. What excites me the most is the light beyond my eyelids. But it is still so hard to open my eyes. My sense of touch returns to my fingertips, and I can feel a soft fabric beneath them. The smell of pine and ginger flows through my nostrils from one direction and the smell of fresh rain and fresh cut grass comes from the other. There is also a citrusy smell floating around.
The purring gets louder and almost annoying.
"What the hell is-" I shake at my own dry rough voice.
"Samantha?!" A seemingly familiar voice calls out to me, and I jump again at the ringing in my ears.
"Oh, my Goddess!" Someone else shouts, a woman to be precise. "You're awake!" Her hands grab mines.
She sits me up slowly and I grunt at the ache in my body.
"Slow, slow." She guides me gently. "Open your eyes."
"I can't!"
"Yes, you can, relax darling."
I take a few breaths and try again to open them. This time my lids peel up slowly at my command and I wince at the blinding lights around me. Everything is so bright and vibrant. For some reason I feel like I can see way clearer and further than before. My nose is extra sensitive and picks up on all the fantastic smells that I smelled earlier, plus more.
"Wait, Rameriez?" I finally recognized the lady beside me. "I'm in the hospital again?"
She nods.
"Tristian?" Mr. pine and ginger. His mouth hangs open like he was caught by surprise and his eyes are clouded over. Is he mind linking someone?
"And, I haven't met you before..." my eyes drift to the man who smells of rain. His long raven black hair and slim face. He is quite handsome, with his big blue eyes and scruffy facial hair.
"This is Alpha Ethan." Rameriez introduces us.
"Ethan." His name rolls off my tongue delightfully and the purring in my head grows louder.
"Why?" He looks at me dumbfounded.
I tilt my head in confusion.
"Mate?" He questions and Rameriez steps in between us defensively.
"Impossible." She growls.
"Mate?" Tristian speaks next.
"What's gotten into you both?!" Rameriez shakes her head frantically.
The two men growl at each other. I looked on, completely lost as to what was happening. An overpowering smell of coconut and coffee starts pouring into the room. My mouth salivates and the purring in my head turns to a full-blown howl.
What the heck?
The door flings open and there he stands naked, his large manhood hanging freely between his legs. If I wasn't hooked on this machine I would pounce on him. His blue eyes locked on mines and a voice that wasn't my own rushes from my lips.
"MATE!" I slap my hand over my mouth.
"Samantha?" Eli smiles, tears spilling out of his eyes.
"Eli?" My eyes automatically water as well.
He gets to my side quickly and throws himself at me. He engulfs me in his arms and kisses me hungerly and I return it.
"I can't believe it." He pulls away breathlessly to look at me.
"What happened, where is Alex?"
He takes a step back and looks around the room. Reluctantly everyone leaves. Tristian and Ethan look a bit frazzled as they exit.
"I will be right outside when you need me." Rameriez gives a wary smile, tossing Eli a pair of shorts from the cupboard by the door. Then she leaves.
"What the hell was that?!" I hear her scolding the men in the hall before the door closes behind her.
"There was an accident." Eli pulls on the shorts and sits down at my bedside. He's fiddling with something in his hands instead of looking at me.
"What do you mean?"
"Car accident." I get a flash memory of the glass and the screaming.
"Really, where's Alex?!"
He is silent. My stomach starts to turn. Something isn't right. I furrow my brows at him; he is holding back from me I can tell. I finally notice what he is fiddling with. It is a beat-up action figure that sort of looks familiar. Well of course it does, it's Alex's. My heart speeds up in my chest when I realize it.
"Where's Alex?" I ask again more frantically.
He doesn't respond. Instead, his body tenses up and he keeps his eyes low.
"Eli, please take me to him!" I beg.
"I can't. I couldn't find him." He mutters.
"What?" I must have heard him wrong. "What did you say?" My body feels lifeless again.
"I'm so sorry, I searched everywhere!" He melts into my lap, begging for my forgiveness. I should have stayed in that hole away from this reality that I am too shocked to believe is real.
"How?" I gasp out. "We have to look again. He must be scared!" I try to get up, but he holds me down firmly.
This type of pain is numbing. I don't know how to react. My baby, my Alex, gone? How am I even here still without him? How did I survive and not him? This makes no sense. A mother isn't supposed to lose her child. Who would she be without one? I found myself gasping for air and before I knew it, I was back in the pit. This time I welcome it.
...