Cherreads

Chapter 30 - author

Heyy so, i will have to apologize If You notice some inconsistancies in the novel the novel has been going for 2 months and i cant remember everything i do check the previous chapters of course but im abit busy and i usually forget before i make another chapter

Some inconsistancies may be

Raels personality

Hes usually easy going and confident

But in the chapter "doubts" we see his fire is so weak because he doubts himself not letting his flame burn as bright as it can but before he showed 0 instances of doubting himself

I used this as we can really see how weak rael seems sometimes

Against lif in the first chapter he got outplayed

But then against the soilder in chapter 5 he managed to outpower him with lif and eventually kill him,

Then against the thief in the bar his fire gets overpowered despite having sela someone who stated to have never used lava before overpower the same Man

Then against Nadia where he was evenly matched with Nadia who's started to learn how to use fire like a week ago, then same chapter again get overpowered by nadias black flame, (we will learn about her black fire soon trust)

And in the last chapter hes obviously weaker than them, especially in the flashback he isnt weak at all, he gets asked to duel and destoryed them, but then when lif came, lif humbled him, why? Because rael isnt a Smart fighter yet he has the strenght he has the versitlity but again fire îs fueled by emotions how can he feel strong emotions If the main emotion he felt is doubting his flame, the second real remembers that and stops doubting himself for a second hes clearly much powerful outright outshining nadias flame,

Then lif going from a lively kid to a outright quiet cold kid which May explain itself because of his current condition, but it changed wayy to fast,

And sela being usually quiet and distant confessed her feelings for lif and then was embarrassed by raels statement, tho i tried to explain it without changing selas character it was still pretty bad

And also besides inconsistancies we have Little screentime for other characters, illys got a chapter true but besides that he seemed irelevent even tho i made it obvious hes strong,

Liora, a character that showed up in almost every chapter for abit but then vanish, shes important VERY important but idk how to make her show up without it seeing forced but i will work on that,

Overly too dark story and shift without warning

Usually stories got a foreshadow before stuff goes downhill but nah i messed up with having lif get tortured, which seems abit much for a 12 year old boy to have whatever îs happening to him rn

And worst,

Bad explination

If You did read You wouldnt really understand whats happening not because its complex but because i didnt really explain most of the power system world and overall story which sucks

Anyways If You are Reading this please give feedback im considering making a discord server and id love to see If yall. Enjoy my work.

More Chapters