White. Pure white.
Aric wandered through his white infinite subconscious space, his clothing still the same black he wore during the fight for Ashwick.
"I always thought being dead would mean like going to heaven or something..."
He sat down in the middle of the infinite void, well, tried to anyways.
"Nothing, huh? Death is just... nothing? That's kind of sad, honestly."
"Not even those 8 minutes of memories replaying when you die kicked in. Looks like our science was wrong about that."
He lay back, crossing his legs.
"But I guess... I've got nothing to complain about. At least I didn't go to hell—that's a plus."
Yet there was an emptiness gnawing at him. Aric couldn't quite understand why he felt this way—he just did.
"...Hmm. I guess I wanted that 8-minute theory to be true. It feels lonely now. I have to stay here for... a long time."
Suddenly, a projector appeared in the room. A wire connected to it seemed to stretch infinitely into the void.
"What the?" Aric stood up, startled by the sudden appearance of the projector.
"Did my brain finally register that I'm dead?"
He walked over and touched its surface. "Well... it feels real enough. Whatever 'real' means anymore."
He pressed the power button, hoping something would play, but all it emitted was light accompanied by a faint buzzing sound.
"Hmm... maybe it needs the good ol' smack."
SMACK!
The projector flickered to life, playing the first cherished memory from his past.
His father who had brown hair, bulky build, and piercing blue eyes, ruffled young Aric's hair and said,
"Hey, kiddo. You're a good man, you know? Great job helping that old lady cross the street."
"Hehe!" Young Aric replied.
"I'm proud of you."
Aric smiled faintly as he watched. "My dad, huh... This must've been when I was eight."
Another memory began to play. "Aric, this cake looks beautiful!"
Young Aric looked up at his mother. "I spent two hours learning how to bake your favourite cake! How is it?"
She took a bite, her green eyes lighting up,
"Oh, this is wonderful, Aric. You even got the chocolate sweetness just right."
"Mom, huh. I guess that tracks." Aric sat down, wrapping his arms around his knees.
"I'm glad my brain or soul or whatever thought these were good memories. I wonder what else will come."
The projector continued, showing him winning a chess competition and his parents lifting him in celebration. Then came the memory of getting accepted into a prestigious high school on a full scholarship.
"Seriously? I was that happy about it?"
Next, in high school, he met Natasha.
"My ex-wife, huh..." Aric gazed at the scene with a bittersweet expression.
"I guess I really did love her until the divorce."
The projector kept rolling through their happiest moments their first date, their first kiss, their first sleepover, and more intimate scenes.
"You're such a bad kisser you know?"
"I'm your bad kisser."
Aric cringed harder with each passing moment,
"Why did I even say that? This shit is cringe as hell!"
Aric then composed himself, "Well... I did love her once, and she loved me. Life was... good, I suppose. Until the war, of course."
The sex scene lingered longer than he expected. A visible vein popped on Aric's forehead.
"What the fuck, man? Can this shit end already?"
Finally, the projector fast-forwarded to his graduation ceremony in philosophy.
"Well, 'Socrates,' you now know the meaning of life." Natasha teased, handing him a bouquet of roses.
Twenty-one-year-old Aric smiled as he accepted them. "More like I have an existential crisis every time I think about it. Doesn't help that I now realize everyone's actions mean something."
Natasha grabbed his hand. "That doesn't matter. Let's meet your parents now."
Watching this, Aric felt a pang in his chest or whatever passed for a heart in his subconscious state.
"Can we move on already? Pretty sure when the projector ends, I literally die. Maybe I become extra dead."
Then came the memory of their wedding day. Natasha, radiant in her white dress, stared at him with her striking blue eyes and raven-black hair.
"God, you're beautiful, you know."
Natasha giggled softly at the altar. "I know."
The priest closed his book. "You may now kiss the bride."
Aric kissed her, and she returned it with equal tenderness.
"I'll always love you, Aric."
"I'll always love you too."
Aric's dad, mom, in laws and friends all cheer for them.
"Let's go my boy!" His dad said with pride.
Tears welled up in Aric's eyes. "Fuck..."
The memory sped forward, showcasing their honeymoon, nights together, and countless dates.
"I take it this isn't considered a core memory, huh? Thank God. I really don't need to relive myself acting like some amateur pornstar."
The projector slowed again, transitioning to the birth of their son, Noah.
"UWAHHH! UWAHHH!"
"He's beautiful." Aric whispered, cradling the newborn lovingly.
"UWAHH! UWAHH!"
"Your name... is Noah, my little boy."
Natasha, exhausted but smiling, reached out. "Can I... have him back now?"
Aric gently handed Noah to her. "Here you go."
Aric covered his face with his hands. "Right... Noah. I wonder how he's doing now. I hope he's okay."
The next memory showed Noah's first word.
"Mama!" he said with glee as he stared at Natasha with his blue eyes.
Natasha playfully nudged Aric's shoulder. "I told you!"
She scooped Noah into her arms. "He said my name first! Who's a good boy? You are, you are!"
Aric remained silent as he tried to not breakdown. The next memory unfolded with him sitting beside Natasha with Noah on his lap while Anais was born. He guided Noah's tiny hand to touch his newborn sister.
"This is your sister, Anais. You must protect her, alright?"
Noah gazed curiously at Anais and exclaimed, "Dada!"
"Yes. You must protect her. She's your sister."
The scene shifted to Anais crawling toward Aric for the first time.
"Good job, Anais!"
Anais laughed joyfully. "Hehe!"
Aric broke down sobbing. "Hik... Hik... Anais... my sweet little girl..."
He tried to wipe away the tears, but they only flowed faster. "Damn it... Damn it..."
When he finally regained control of his emotions, Anais stared deeply into his hazel eyes and said,
"DADA!"
Aric, holding her close, cried tears of joy. "Yes, sweetheart! I am your dada!"
"DADA!"
"Hehe! Yes, yes. I'm your daddy."
Natasha held Noah in her arms. "Well, looks like the score is tied now. One for each of us, huh?"
She pinched Anais's cheeks and smiled. "You're such a cute angel."
Aric cried even harder, no longer looking at the projector as pain gripped his non-existent heart.
"I miss you two so much... I miss you both... I wish I could see you one last time..."
The projector emitted a new sound:
"I love you, Dad!"
Aric looked up through tear-filled eyes to see Christmas morning. He had surprised them with gifts, hugging them tightly and rubbing their backs.
"I love you too."
The projector replayed countless sweet memories: Noah's first bike ride, Anais baking a cake, their first family vacation, and their very first concert together. Life had been perfect.
But inevitably, the projector stopped. A development that didn't surprise Aric.
"Well..." As he wiped away his snot and tears, "That's where the sweet memories end. Guess my mind only wanted to show me the good stuff which I'm not complaining..."
"Since after this, comes war and death...then divorce and heartbreaks...addictions...ugh."
"So many deaths, so many sleepless nights. Mom and dad died in the war...If only mom and dad weren't so stubborn and just fled the country."
"It's fine though. I got my family relocated in time."
Aric stood up. "I guess my eight minutes are done even though it felt like an hour. I can't complain though. I got to see my kids again...Now..."
The memory replayed again in his eyes.
Tears streamed down his face once more. "Damn it... I miss them so much. Ugh. If only there was a way to get back to Earth. Reverse isekai or something."
Aric wiped away the tears, "I don't know. It doesn't matter anymore."
He approached the projector again and pressed the button, hoping it would restart but it remained unresponsive, emitting only its monotonous buzz.
SMACK! SMACK!
Still, the projector refused to cooperate.
"How the fuck is my own mind giving me a malfunctioning projector? What kind of messed-up crap is this!?"
Unexpectedly, the projector sputtered to life one again, displaying a new scene. A stunning woman lay beside him in bed—grey hair cascading over her shoulders, blue eyes filled with curiosity.
"Noah and Anais, huh... Those are your children..."
Aric looked up at the screen, seeing Seraphina staring directly at him.
"Do you miss them? The way you describe them... it's like they're the best thing that ever happened to you."
"...Yeah. They were the best thing to happen to me."
"Not even your mom and dad?"
Aric chuckled a little, "I guess when I became a dad myself, my children were my priority. Don't get me wrong, I still love my parents very much but my kids...I would die for them. Well, I nearly did for war but you get the point."
Seraphina smiled a little, "I guess, that makes sense. You know, since you have been talking to me about them, it got me thinking about starting my own as well. I wonder what it feels like to be a mother..."
"What? You don't have kids?"
"No. I didn't want kids at the time since, I was too busy managing my family assets. And being married to Vayne didn't really entice me to have his kids. You know, the whole asshole thing."
Aric looked down to himself and then looked back at her,
"Yeah...I can see why. I mean, this Vayne dude is the biggest piece of shit I know and I live inside of him."
Seraphina touched his shoulder, "It wasn't your choice anyways. I am sorry once again for mistreating you so many times. If there's anything I can do to make it up to you, please tell me. You did not deserve all the harsh things I have done."
Aric looking at this memory felt his heart ached again,
"....What the hell? Why does it hurt?"
The memory kept on playing with Aric just being silent and Seraphina still looking at him.
"It's okay Aric. I know what I did is not forgivable but I am sincere on that offer."
Seraphina clearly reading the room, cleared her throat, "Ahem. Anyways, I'll tell you about the time Evelyn set me up with this duke only for him to like men."
Aric who stayed silent, suddenly laughed, "The fuck? How does that even happen?"
Aric watched as the conversation fast-forwarded again. He was confused about why Seraphina was here.
"She abused me, berated me and made me feel worthless. I don't get it. Why is she here? How did she become a core memory?"
"Because she accepted you." came a voice behind him, "Unlike our family."
Aric turned around to see... himself. Dressed in his military uniform, rifle slung over his shoulder.
"Unlike our kids and wife, she accepted us even when she was hurting herself."