Now sitting on the couch in the living room with casual home clothes, Kane sits with a slouched back and his elbows on his knees, his gaze fixated on the papers on the coffee table.
His mother is standing there infront of the TV with a relaxed expression on her face and her hands held together behind her back. She begins to speak in a soft voice unaware of what her son is thinking, "You've been staring at that paper for quite awhile now, Kane-kun~."
Her son looks up at her with an extremely blank stare never seen before on his face, looking as if there are no thoughts going through his head due to the shock he had experienced at the front door as soon as he got home.
"Nani? Sumimasen... Mou ichimon onegaishimasu, okaasan[1]..."
"Ehh~? Did you forget that our readers can't understand Japanese, Kane-kun~?"
Staring at her defeated son, Kane's mother sighs before walking closer to her son and sitting next to him, before stroking the top of his black hair in an attempt to comfort him. She then begins to speak with a soft tone.
"Kane-kun~, I know this must be really sudden for someone your age... but just know we aren't punishing you or anything — we honestly just want you to not rely on us too much. Who knows? We might leave this world earlier than you think~!"
"No..."
"Ehh~? Why'd you say 'no' all of a sudden, Kane-kun?"
Kane looks at his mother with a troubled expression as tears begin to well up in his eyes. He inhales through his nose aggressively before speaking in a shaky voice, "...Why did you guys choose this apartment complex?"
His mother looks at him with an innocent gaze — seemingly confused by what he focused on, before answering without hesitation, "Uhm... what's wrong with this apartment complex, though? Isn't it less of a hassle to commute since it's closer to the school?"
He reaches for the paper on the coffee table; once he has the paper in his hand, begins to lean his back deeper onto the sofa before looking up at the roof while raising the paper high up infront of his face.
"...It's just — how do I say this properly..."
Kane focuses his eyes on the picture of the apartment complex as he begins to recall a past memory from a simpler time...
⋆｡°✩
The snow fell slowly from the gray sky. One small snowflake falls into the mittens of a small boy who is bundled up in a stuffy scarf and winter attire. He looks up at the sky with widened eyes and a wide smile.
"Kane-chan, I need you to behave yourself." A deep and emotionless voice echoed on from the sideline. The young Kane turns over to the man who was his father, who looked like he had less gray hairs compared to his present self.
Kane looks up at his father with amazement as he silently nods; his mother then calls him from behind, "Kane-kun~, don't forget to give your present to Erisa-chan, Hai~?"
Looking behind him, he looks at his mother who has squatted down to his level while holding a box wrapped skillfully in Christmas wrapping, topped off with a yellow ribbon delicately placed on the top.
He reaches out his hands slowly while nodding energetically as his mother carefully plops the present unto his plump gray mittens with a sweet smile; Kane looks at the present with an innocent gaze as his mother stands up and walks to the side of him.
His mother reaches out her hand to the young Kane, who shyly takes her hand while holding the present in the other hand. The Koyasu household then begins to walk as his father leads the way toward the lobby.
As his father walks up to the receptionist to initiate a conversation, Kane begins looking around the lobby with awe — the sleek and modern white aesthetic it holds, even the glass door they entered the lobby with was automatic... Japanese technology is the best!
He tugs at the wool coat of his mother, which his mother notices almost instantly thanks to her maternal instincts, as she begins to look down at him with a warm gaze while saying, "Hai~? What is it, Kane-kun~?"
Kane looks up at her with a cute blush on his cheeks as he speaks shyly, "W-when I'm older... I-I want to live here as well! I-I want to live close to Erisa-chan so we can play together all the time!"
His mother looks at her son with widened eyes, clearly shocked by his statement, but that expression slowly fades as she giggles to herself and squats down to his height. She begins rubbing his gray winter hat.
Closing his eyes, the young Kane sinks deeper into his black parka. Suddenly, the rubbing stops and he reopens his eyes, seeing his mother smiling warmly at him. Her lips open and she speaks with a reassuring voice.
"Of course~! I bet Erisa-chan would be excited to hear that news as well!"
Kane looks up at his mother with a wide smile, before nodding his head up and down energetically — it seems the sweet potato that is Kane is really happy.
His father then walks up to the two of them, before gesturing to the two of them to follow him with that same old blank expression; his mother stands up and reaches out to Kane's hand, which he grabs instinctively, and after which they proceed to the elevator.
DING!
As soon as they reach the third floor, they make their way to a black door, and to the side of it is a sign that has the words 'Fujikawa' written on a golden plate that was bolted on the wall to the side of the door.
Kane's father knocks on the door three times with his middle finger, and after a short wait, the door opens to a messy, purple-haired man wearing glasses, the man who had opened the door looks at the man infront of him with a smile, before greeting, "Kanzaburo-chan! Hisashiburi![2]"
He wraps his arm around Kane's father — who I will be calling Kanzaburo from now on, since I have now finally learned his name... man, I probably should have pulled up Kane's folder, huh?
Kanzaburo, for the first time ever since I started narrating Kane's life, pushes up his glasses and a surprisingly slight blush appears on his cheeks, before speaking in a low voice, "Mm... Hisashiburi, Yoshimitsu-kun."
Yoshimitsu bursts into a hearty laugh while patting the back of his old pal. "Wahaha! You're still as cold as ever, Kanzaburo-chan!"
He then looks at the child and woman infront of him, before asking, "Ooh~! This must be your family, right? Nice to meet you, Maya-chan and Kane-kun! Kanzaburo-chan has told great stories about you guys!"
Maya holds her cheek with her hand and tilts her head sideways, before speaking in a soft tone, "Ara~, is that so? My husband also tells stories from when you two met back in middle school~!"
She laughs, before continuing, "He always said how you always had to go home early the week before exam week because you always seemingly had severe diarrhea-"
"No way!" Yoshimitsu interjects as he stands infront of her while forming an 'X' with his two hands and a severe case of embarrassment plastered on his face.
Kanzaburo pushes up his glasses in confidence and a slight smirk forms on his face, clearly proud of what he has told his family and their hijinks together throughout their school life.
Yoshimitsu shakily turns over his shoulder to look at Kanzaburo with gritted teeth, a twitching eyebrow, and a prominent blush on his cheeks, before whispering to him quietly, "You didn't have to tell them everything...!"
With a defeated sigh, he walks over to the front door with a slouched back and a defeated expression before gesturing and telling them, "Please, come inside..."
The Koyasu household happily enters the Fujikawa apartment. Kane timidly walks behind his mother's leg while holding on to her pants tightly. After taking off their shoes, they begin to make their way to the living room.
One figure, however, catches the attention of the young Kane.
"Erisa-chan!"
Kane happily exclaims while running to the young Erisa who is sat by the kotatsu[3], as if his anxiety and shyness had miraculously disappeared into the black void of nothingness.
Things almost come to a standstill, with Kane running toward Erisa with the biggest smile he could give, and Erisa who is sitting there with an accepting smile and a bright red blush on her cheeks.
The surrounding area begins to fade to white, starting with the three adults behind him, then the hallway, followed by the kitchen and the balcony, and lastly, the living room — leaving only him and Erisa.
Yet, even after all those that faded into the white void, Erisa also disappears, leaving Kane alone, afraid... and broken. He looks around the white space, and every time he called out someone's name, it only just echoed with no response ever reaching him.
He falls to his knees, defeated and lost. He lost everything... You lost everything, Kane. Everything that mattered to you, they all left — you can't rely on anyone else. You can only rely on yourself.
...
You're alone, Kane.
...
"You'll always stay alone."
⋆｡°✩
Kane reopens his eyes slowly, finding himself on his bed looking extremely groggy. He reaches for his phone lazily and clicks the power button with his thumb — he squints his eyes due to the extreme amount of light being blasted directly on his face.
"...Ugh, 3:34 AM..."
He muttered half-heartedly before placing his phone back. He looks up at his ceiling, his eyebags atrociously obvious, possibly due to a lack of proper sleep.
"...I can't sleep."
He tries to push himself out of his bed, and to his dismay, he just falls back down on to his bed. His expression turns cold and tired — tired of everything, tired of all the pain and suffering he had to endure.
"...Do I really have to do this?"
He looks at the calendar next to his door, and the most notable thing that is written on such a plain calendar was Saturday, which was marked 'Moving Day' with a red marker; Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday are marked out with a big 'X'.
"...Why can't I sleep?"
For three nights, he hadn't got any sleep ever since he learned that he was moving into the same apartment as Erisa. Wasn't that his dream? Didn't he want to play with Erisa almost everyday back when they were children?
"..."
He laid there in silence. Looking back on those uneventful days at school that passed by almost instantly — it is as if... he never existed. Tears begin to well up in his empty eyes as he looks back at those painful memories.
"...Alone..."
He recalls that one word... that one singular word that he remembers vividly broke him as a person. That one word amongst the sea of words that caused all this suffering for him — because of this, he embodied it, he embodied everything she told him.
"...I should have never been born..."
He spoke under his breathe, completely and utterly lost — devoid of any direction. As Kane reaches the peak of his depression, he recalls a certain image from his memory. A certain past he chose to never let go off.
A singular tear escapes his eye due to this recollection. Kane is shocked by this sudden tear as he wipes it away with his thumb before looking at it. He grits his teeth in denial as more tears start to flow out of his eyes.
"...N-no... w-why, why am I... crying?"
He tries to wipe away his tears, but with each wipe, two more tears take its place. Kane knew that it was useless to wipe away these tears, so he just let them flow as he laid on his bed, gripping tightly onto his blanket.
"...This can't be..."
He denies his own emotions, trying his best rationalize this sudden outburst — but, there was only one thing... one thing that can fully explain why this is making him so emotional; so vulnerable, so weak... that thing that was missing, he knew it all along — he longed for it. He missed it but he never gave himself the chance to chase it.
"You..."
His tears have stopped with one final drop, he stares blankly at his ceiling, the color slowly returning to his eyes as he begins to see flashes of a certain person's smile. That warm and comforting smile he received all those years ago.
"...I want to see your smile again."
[1] This phrase, which I will not be rewriting again in Romanji
(なに? すみません... もうちもんうおねがいします,おかあさん...) Roughly translates to "What? Sorry... Please repeat yourself, Mom."
[2] The term "Hisashiburi" (久しぶり) translates to "Long time no see" or "It's been a while". It's a casual way to greet someone you haven't seen in a while.
[3] A kotatsu is a low-lying, heated table that is a traditional Japanese household item, especially popular during the colder months. It's characterized by a low table frame, covered with a heavy blanket or futon, and a heater built into the underside of the table.