"Chapter 9: Wand Sparks & Fox Steps"
Harry Arc – Part 3: Gold, Wands, and Controlled Chaos
The next morning, Harry found himself wedged between Hagrid and the window of a squeaky underground train, Dratini resting like an animated boa on his shoulders, snorting sparks in his sleep.
"Where exactly are we going again?" Harry asked.
"London. More specifically, Diagon Alley," Hagrid said with a proud grin. "Time to get yer school supplies. Wands, robes, books... and maybe a muzzle for that lil' beastie."
Dratini snorted lightning in protest, still half-asleep.
Leaky Cauldron & Brick Wall Magic
They stepped into a dingy pub called the Leaky Cauldron. Hagrid greeted everyone like they were drinking buddies. Tom the bartender tried to pet Dratini. Tom now has a new hairstyle called "crispy."
"Alright, let's get yer wand first," Hagrid said, stepping up to the brick wall behind the pub. He tapped a few bricks with his pink umbrella.
Click… click… GRRRR-CHUNK.
The bricks folded away, revealing Diagon Alley in all its chaotic, magical glory.
Harry gasped.
"Bloody hell," he muttered.
Dratini perked up with stars in his eyes. Literally. His pupils briefly turned to sparkly stars.
Gringotts Goblins and Gold
Their first stop was Gringotts.
Inside the white marble wizard bank, goblins looked up from ledgers to glare at Harry and especially at Dratini, who kept trying to nibble the glowing chandeliers.
The cart ride to Vault 687 was wilder than a dragon roller coaster.
Harry screamed.
Dratini screamed louder.
Hagrid lost his lunch.
Inside the vault, Harry found more gold than he'd ever seen in his life. Dratini immediately dove into it like a hungry Gyarados, tossing coins into the air and trying to catch them in his mouth.
"…I think he thinks this is his hoard now," Harry whispered.
Hagrid chuckled. "Let 'im dream."
Ollivander's Wand Shop: Trial by Lightning
"Right," Hagrid said, wiping his forehead, "just the wand now."
They stepped into the narrow, dusty wand shop, where hundreds of boxes were stacked to the ceiling. The moment the door creaked shut, a voice echoed through the shadows.
"I wondered when I'd be seeing you, Mr. Potter."
Mr. Ollivander slid into view like a ghost in tweed, peering at Harry with pale, curious eyes.
"And this..." He squinted at Dratini. "...is not listed in any bestiary I know."
"Yeah, that's about right," Harry replied, trying to keep Dratini from melting a display case.
"Let's find your wand, shall we?"
Fifteen wand boxes later…
— One wand burst into fireworks.— Another exploded a lamp.— A third made Dratini sneeze lightning, which accidentally animated a taxidermy raven that began squawking insults in Latin.
Finally, Ollivander handed Harry a wand of holly and phoenix feather.
The moment Harry touched it, a warm pulse traveled through his arm—and Dratini let out a pleased trill.
"Curious… very curious," Ollivander murmured. "That wand shares a core with another. Its brother gave you... that scar."
Harry blinked.
Dratini's tail curled protectively over the lightning bolt on his forehead.
Ollivander looked at the dragon-like creature. "You've been marked by destiny, Mr. Potter. Both of you."
As They Left the Shop
Back on the cobbled street, Harry sighed in awe. "I have gold. A wand. A pet dragon."
"Technically not a dragon," Hagrid corrected.
Harry grinned. "Don't care. Feels like I'm finally someone."
Dratini chirped and did a corkscrew spin of agreement.
[Konoha – Naruto's Arc: Part 3 – Tails of Triumph]
Naruto practically burst out of the academy doors like a confetti cannon.
"I'M A GENIN, BELIEVE IT!"
Villagers stared.
A cat fainted.
Iruka sighed from the second-floor window, smiling despite himself.
Vulpix tried to dodge the incoming tackle but was caught midair by Naruto's flying hug. "I DID IT, FLUFFBALL!"
"Vullll…" she grumbled, tails flailing in protest.
Kurama, resting in the mental landscape, muttered, "This idiot's joy is so loud I can hear it across dimensions."
[Later That Day – Ramen Victory Feast]
Ichiraku Ramen had never heard such slurping.
Naruto was halfway through bowl #4 when he turned to Vulpix, who sat on the counter like a noble fox queen.
"You want some miso? Or—WAIT. Do foxes eat ramen?"
Vulpix blinked once, then gracefully stole a boiled egg from his bowl with her tail and chomped it.
Kurama snorted. "She's more cultured than you."
"HEY, I'm plenty cultured!"
"You tried to microwave a kunai last week."
Naruto grumbled into his noodles.
[That Night – A Foxy Plan Unfolds]
Kurama summoned Vulpix into Naruto's mindscape as the boy snored upside-down on his futon.
"He's improving," Kurama said, lounging with one tail flicking lazily. "But he's still too raw. We need to push him."
Vulpix nodded. "Training montage?"
Kurama smirked. "Spiritual boot camp."
The next morning, Naruto woke up to—
[System Notification: New Quest Available – "Trail of Tails: Unlock the Inner Beast"]
Objective: Follow Vulpix and survive her trial. (Good luck.)
Naruto blinked. "Uh-oh."
Outside, Vulpix waited. She turned, tails flicking in challenge, and dashed off.
Naruto had five seconds to react before she triggered a chakra mine.
BOOM.
Soot-faced, Naruto screamed, "WHAT KIND OF TRIAL IS THIS?!"
[Fox Trials – Day 1: Speed & Reflexes]
Naruto chased Vulpix through the forest, leaping over logs, dodging chakra traps she laid with glee.
Every time he tripped, Kurama's voice echoed: "Use your chakra! Feel her movements!"
Vulpix jumped onto a tree, bounced to a rock, then backflipped into a creek.
Naruto followed — and faceplanted.
[Fox Trials – Day 2: Chakra Control]
Vulpix perched on a pond, standing atop the water like it was solid ground.
Naruto? Splash.
Kurama sighed, "Tilt your chakra, brat. You're a leaf, not a log."
By sunset, Naruto was walking on water.
Sort of.
He was more like… hopping.
[Fox Trials – Day 3: Illusion & Trickery]
"Alright," Naruto panted. "What now?"
Vulpix split into six identical copies and played tag in a field of illusionary logs, fire traps, and genjutsu frogs.
Naruto screamed.
Kurama cackled.
By nightfall, Naruto had bruises, a singed eyebrow, and a grin as wide as Konoha.
"I'M GETTING STRONGER!"
[Back in the Mindscape – Foxes Talk Strategy]
Kurama: "He's almost ready. One or two more days, and we teach him the Spiral Flame Fang."
Vulpix: "Stylish name. Did you come up with that?"
Kurama: "No. Jake did. He said it would sell merch."
They both paused… and nodded sagely.
[System Notification: Naruto Uzumaki – Skill Unlocked: Fox-Step, Level 1]
Naruto looked at the screen.
"Fox-Step? That sounds cool. What does it do?"
He suddenly vanished mid-sentence and reappeared 10 feet away, upside-down in a tree.
"…AWESOME."
[Jake's Interlude – Viewer Mail, Gold Fever, and Fox Shenanigans]
Somewhere in the cosmic ether, between a flaming ramen pot and a taxidermy raven screaming "Inferiorus Maximus!", Jake floated upside down on a reclining lounge chair that defied gravity, time, and furniture design standards.
A holographic mug that said "#1 Multiverse Overwatcher" spun slowly in the void beside him.
He took a sip. "Mmm. Meta-coffee. Tastes like potential."
With a flick of his wrist, two screens popped into existence.
One showed Harry, trying to hold back a spark-drunk Dratini from melting a pile of wand boxes.
The other displayed Naruto, half-covered in soot, grinning like he'd just stolen Christmas and got away with it.
Jake sighed.
"These two… are going to be the death of my sanity. But wow, they're entertaining."
[Screen 1 – Wizard Rookie Mode: Chaos Edition]
Jake watched as Ollivander's shop went from "eerie and mysterious" to "electrified fireworks depot."
One of the animated taxidermy ravens was now holding a sign that read "SEND HELP."
Jake snorted.
"Look at my boy Harry. Baby lightning bolt and already leveling buildings like he's cosplaying Zeus' apprentice."
He paused.
"…and he thinks he's not special. Buddy, your snake-puppy just cooked a bartender for making eye contact."
The camera zoomed in on Dratini snuggling into a bag of gold coins like a smug noodle dragon.
Jake nodded, impressed. "That's right. Claim your wealth. Late-stage capitalism, baby."
[Screen 2 – Fox Bootcamp: Sponsored by Pain]
Now to Naruto.
The poor kid just stepped on a genjutsu frog that ribbited in Morse code.
Jake cackled. "Vulpix is savage. Kurama's mentoring style is 'sink or explode trying.' And this kid still says thank you."
He leaned closer to the screen.
"Fox-Step unlocked? Oh, this is where it gets fun."
Naruto vanished and reappeared ten feet up a tree, upside-down, yelling "AWESOME" as his sandals flew off mid-teleport.
"Yep," Jake muttered. "Classic Shōnen protagonist energy: zero fear, all vibes."
He tapped the air and a blinking banner appeared:
[Viewer Poll Active: Which one's more unhinged? 🐍 Harry or 🦊 Naruto?]
Cast your votes now. Winner gets bonus XP. Loser? Also gets XP. But less smug about it.
[Backstage Banter – Jake's Notes to the System]
Jake conjured a scroll and scribbled something in chaotic cursive.
TO: The System
SUBJECT: Trajectory check
MESSAGE: We might need fireproof insurance for Ollivander. And maybe chakra-resistant furniture for Konoha. Just saying.
He attached a doodle of Dratini wearing sunglasses and Naruto holding ramen like a trophy.
[Final Words – And the Road Ahead]
Jake folded his hands behind his head.
"So… two kids. One with a literal baby dragon that breathes lightning. The other with ADHD powered by mythical foxes. Both about to become heroes."
He smirked.
"Oh yeah. I've got front-row seats to the multiverse's biggest glow-up."
The screens faded to black as Jake whispered to no one in particular:
"Let the chaos continue."