The request to be at ease away from the sudden impact of the alarming news was all that Claire wanted, in that exact moment she learned the truth. After evading the conversation from Lyn as respectfully as she could, Claire seated herself in isolation, distancing herself away from everyone by hiding near the shoulder of a torn couch. She shuddered upon repeating the same information she had learned inside her mind, blissfully unaware of the repercussions it would have in the future.
In that moment, all she wanted was all of the worries of the world to vanish. If there was some miracle that allowed her to melt through the ground and disappear from existence, in that moment, she would have wanted to do so.
She huddled her knees together while on the sofa as she blanked out, staring across to the well-lit floors by herself. Aware of Lyn nearby, she purposefully chose not to look at her until Ardine approached her from the side. Although she could not see his face, she could tell that he was there to comfort her, no matter what kind of predicament she found herself into.
"Hey, kiddo," Ardine began, hiding his left hand behind his waist. His low voice was a symptom of secrecy and slow mood. "Got a second to chat?"
"Just..." Claire replied with a heavy tone. She realized the strength of her attitude was beginning to sour the others around her, which she heavily discouraged. After sinking her forehead between her knees to hide her face in shame, her muffled voice regretted her initial statement. "Nothing. Go ahead."
Ardine, fully aware of Claire's sudden grief, spoke as calmly as possible to not provoke her. "Uh... I never got to fully thank you for what you did back at the graveyard. Blessing my family. It took a lot of strength to do that."
"It's nothing." Claire pushed away, resting her chin against her knees as she stared ahead at absolutely nothing.
"No..." Ardine conjectured, sitting beside her shoulder to shoulder. "It's not nothing. You should give yourself credit."
"I don't deserve credit," Claire continued to beat herself up. "I don't... I just don't..." She couldn't finish her sentence.
Ardine inhaled a deep breath. "Alright. Tell me what's wrong." He said.
Claire shook her head and dove her forehead back into her knees, unsure of what to say. There were no words in her system that could reveal her true feelings. She zipped her eyes shut as her face began to blister in sudden body heat, attempting to prevent her emotions from spilling out again. Ardine patiently waited for her, respecting the space and distance she put between her.
"When... is it fully acceptable... to move on from the past?" Claire questioned, still possessed by a paralyzed inability to shift her gaze. "When does it become okay to move on from the deaths of others? To forget the idea of vengeance, or to escape ghosts that haunt you every night? Should I even bother? When does it get easier?"
Ardine knew the answer to her question. "It never gets easier." He said.
Hatred seethed within her frail voice. "That man at the graveyard killed my friends and family," Claire bitterly stated. "And I dream about that night when I held their hands. Blood splatters against my face. The metallic scent of rotting corpses from that village. People with painted masks, insulting me and taking my cowardice for a thrilling show to watch and unveil like a present," She turned to face Ardine, trying to hold in her sharp grief, but failing miserably. "I don't know what to do anymore. Who do I even follow? What do I do?"
Ardine turned to face forward, nodding in understanding. "I struggled... for a long time... when my wife and daughter died. I came back and buried them myself in that graveyard," He spoke in a hushed tone. "But in that moment, I wasn't even the littlest bit upset at anyone. I was only thinking about what I could have done to save them."
Just like me, Claire thought. Only... I was upset.
"But then I realized... that in a few weeks... months... even a few years later... they wouldn't have wanted me to remember them for their deaths, or to stir the pot of my sadness forever. No. They would have wanted me to be happy again, and to use their names and memories as an excuse to strengthen my resolve. To swear to myself that I would change... and that I could move on my own."
Szene... Thatcher... Pirelle? Mossen?
Ardine turned to face Claire. "I'm sure the loved ones that you speak of wouldn't want the same thing for you either," He said. "This path of vengeance that you walk would be something they would denounce on the spot. They would have wanted you to just be a kid, just like me, I bet. And I absolutely know; I've been on this path of vengeance before, and... it never ends well."
Claire turned away and took Ardine's words to heart.
"We just gotta keep moving, kid," He finalized. "And one day, we'll be finally rewarded. I'm sure of it."
Silence broke the tension between the two as Ardine relaxed his shoulders. Claire knew that his wise words were true, but the idea of doing so seemed impossible. "Easier said than done." She mentioned.
"True. But it always helps to have people around you to help you with that." He finalized, smiling at Claire to invoke a sense of brilliant hope.
Claire couldn't help but smile back, realizing that his reference to himself, Lyn, and Alfaic was effective in changing her somber demeanor. She then spoke in a small whisper, so quiet that even a fluttering butterfly could hear her mince words.
"I don't know... if I can ever do that." She whispered, trailing her voice into a final halt after remembering the fond faces of Szene and her family. The confidence and brilliance of the village family was all that she wanted to associate herself with. She wanted to bring that demeanor back into her life, but she realized there was nothing similar to it that could replicate that same feeling. All was hopeless, until she saw and noticed Ardine's presence beside her.
It was warm.
"But... I'll try." Claire concluded, shrugging her left shoulder while extending her knees down until her face was visible. Her eyes rolled down to her cheeks, as she continued to purposefully hid the change ono her face.
Despite only knowing the group for a few days, she could see a new fire rising within them that ignited her passion to protect them, much like she wanted to do to Szene and the others. She refused to let the same result happen to them, now that she could understand the perspectives of others in a different light. There was no purpose in life, until now. Her purpose had reunited with her, and ever since that stone gate blocked her entrance from reaching Szene's soul departing, she could finally sense that gate closing behind her, washing away the sins of her vengeance.
"Well," Ardine continued, revealing something hidden in his left hand. He handed it over to Claire, who was still stuck in her silent realization. "Guess it's the perfect time to also take a look at this."
A rusted periwinkle shaded tin caught Claire's attention immediately as a cat would during a hunt. Her ears perked up, along with her white eyes brightening over the unusual object. She held the tin and examined it closely, finding a small latch on the top that she could remove to unveil the insides of the object.
She chuckled and looked at Ardine as if he was insane. "What is this?" She asked.
He made a fast popping sound with his lips, hiding his eyes away from Claire's as well. "Candy." He confessed.
"Candy? Where'd you find this?"
"Where else? Knicked it from the ground."
"Yeah, but… wouldn't something like this be way over its expiration date?"
Ardine peeked his head over to gaze upon the candy tin for a millisecond before nestling back in his original seat. He tapped a part of the tin with his fingernail multiple times. "Uh, well… I checked. Date's only got about a year before it expires. Surprised it's still intact. Lucky, lucky."
Claire shook her head, holding the tin close to her chest to examine it close.
"Well?" Ardine began. "What are you waiting for? Go ahead and eat one."
"I don't trust it." Claire stated, nudging it back against Ardine's shoulder.
"Well, I tried one earlier, and it was mighty good," Ardine replied, raising his eyebrows rapidly to entice her to eat. "Really good stuff."
Claire pressed her lips together and plucked the tin's latch to reveal a colorful assortment of bean-sized candies, glistening with artificial juice to give it a visually appealing texture. The bright green and dark blue candies were the ones that gave Claire a mouth-watering tinge that shimmered in her mouth. She carefully took out the green one, coating her fingertips in the sticky juice. After planting it in her mouth, a sudden burst of sour flavor forced her to pucker her lips and cheeks, beyond abnormal reaction.
Ardine began to laugh aloud, watching Claire bang the floor beneath her.
"Oh my GOD," Claire's voice could barely be made out after the power of the sour. "It's SOUR!? I have to spit it out."
"No, come on, keep going." Ardine could barely contain his laughter.
Claire endured several seconds of the flavor until it began to diminish. She glared at Ardine's eyes with maliciousness, but it calmed down after a sweet flavor began to kick in. "Oh. It's sweet now." She said.
"Yup," Ardine said. "By the way, I was lying when I said I tried it."
"So it could have been poisonous?" Claire said, leaving it on the tip of her tongue. "I could have died!"
"Well, you didn't. So..."
Claire grabbed a handful of candies and began shoving it in Ardine's face, which was an unexpected action that caught him off guard. As much as she tried to get him to eat it, all of the candies ended up slipping out of her hands, falling on his lap instead.
"Shit, shit!" Ardine chuckled. "You're wasting good food!"
"I don't care! Eat it!" Claire laughed back.
After the two had tussled with each other long enough for them to be satisfied, they had calmed down after sharing the candy with each other normally. Their moods lightened each other's personalities there and then, creating a moment where life seemed normal despite its extenuating chaotic circumstances. But in that exact moment, it was bliss.
"Should we give some to Lyn?" Claire asked.
"I don't know if she could handle it," Ardine said. "Knowing Lyn... she probably wouldn't react."
"You couldn't even handle it yourself, old man." Claire said, closing the tin of half-eaten candies.
Ardine cocked his head to the side to face Claire with a questioned expression, curling his left eyebrow down. "That's a funny expression, isn't it?" He curtly asked.
"What?"
"Old man," Ardine emphasized. "I'm not that old, but you always say it whenever you talk to me. Where did you get it from? Why do you say it?"
Claire looked aside, summoning the courage to confess the truth now that they had fully settled down together in comfort. "It was from a man that took care of me, along with some people who treated me like family. His daughter always called him 'old man,' and I guess I adopted the same habit."
"Daughter?" Ardine asked. "So the man was her father?"
"Yeah," Claire said. "His name was Thatcher. I didn't know too much about him, but he didn't treat me like I was a foreigner when I met him. They despised Qliphosians... but he seemed different. No, he was different. Both him and my friend... they made me feel like I had a family."
"I see." Ardine said, staring ahead. But then, an epiphany struck him, causing him to slowly turn his head back to Claire with a light smile.
"What?" Claire asked, observing his unusual movement.
"So if you're calling me "Old Man," does that mean..."
"What? No!" Claire exclaimed, hiding her face from embarrassment. She found the feeling unusual in the moment, making her freckled face blossom in shyness. However, after realizing the immaturity in her uncouth response, she gracefully turned around and coughed, wanting to clarify her perspective. "I mean... I don't... I don't know."
"Ouch." Ardine jested, leaning his arms back in sarcastic casualness.
"Sorry," Claire continued. "It must have been an unconscious thing, I-I didn't..."
"Right," Ardine said. "I had a feeling."
"But..." Claire turned around, eyes beginning to swell up. "I don't want to invalidate what you had before. I never meant to."
"No, you're right."
Claire's anger began to stir rapidly to Ardine's senseless responses. She spoke in a hushed tone, wanting nothing but to admit the rationale to her actions. "Szene... Thatcher... the elderly tailor... and the others, including my parents, who I can't even remember a single fucking thing about. They all cared about me, but now they've all died, or moved on... except for you."
"Hmm." Ardine said.
"Well, the others too," She clarified, mentioning Lyn and Alfaic. "But... I don't know..."
Ardine stood up from his seat and extended his hand for Claire to reach. She glanced up with a regretful expression, which transformed into light joy after piecing her feelings together. With her left hand, she pulled herself up with Ardine's help. Immediately after, Ardine pulled her close and gave her a warm hug, nestling the back of her brown hair with his palm.
Claire did as well, imagining the person holding him was the father who had abandoned her. It was the father that she never knew, including Thatcher, who had passed the baton onward. She could envision her blank slate father and Thatcher beside her, watching and approving of her next step to a bright future.
"You're a good kid, Claire." Ardine commented briefly. "You'll be alright."
The image of Claire's father and Thatcher vanished as they treaded separate paths, never to be seen again. Although she was hesitant at first, Claire closed her eyes and smiled as a single teardrop fell from her eyes. But it was not a teardrop of pain nor anguish, but of freedom. It was a joyous freedom.
"I know..." Claire whispered.