"Aren't I amazing?" Ino turned toward Ren, giving him a victory sign with her fingers and expecting praise.
She completely ignored the silent wails of despair Sasuke was releasing as he stared transfixed on his reflection in the water, both grinning and crying at the same time as if he were deranged.
Ren only gave Ino an unamused look before he started rubbing the bridge of his nose in exasperation.
"Haah~. You just created more work for me, Ino. Now I will need to explain to the boy that he can't use his new eyes recklessly, or he will go blind."
Ino's smile quickly fell. "Wait, really? Is Sharingan that bad?"
"Nah. Not Sharingan." Ren shook his head. "Sharingan's fine. It's this new level you helped him unlock that's harmful to his eyes."
"Uh... sorry?" The blonde girl shuffled in her place, and Ren stole a few headpats during her inattentive moment.
"Don't worry about it, Ino. You meant well." He reassuringly smiled at the scowling girl as she pushed his hand away from her head and quickly created a shadow clone.
It was adorable. In private, she loved and demanded her headpats. But in public, where somebody could see her? Her reputation would be ruined… is what she liked to proclaim.
"Let's go. My clone can talk to Sasuke."
With that, Ren took Ino's hand and decided to leave, ignoring his clone that was giving him a pointed, unhappy glare.
Well, duh. He created a shadow clone for this because he didn't want to do it himself. But somebody had to do it, and if a bit of clone abuse was going to solve the problem, then that was a price he was willing to pay.
...
"He was like, 'Trust me, bro!' and I was like, 'Kacha~n' and 'Kopaw!' and his nuts went like, 'CRACK!' and and-"
"Naruto. That's enough." Hiruzen Sarutobi deeply sighed as he stopped the excited young man from continuing. When he asked Naruto for a verbal report, he expected something more... professional?
Hell, he would be fully happy with something that actually made at least a bit of sense, but Naruto once again surprised him. His inability to give a proper report almost rivaled Minato's naming sense.
Sage, bless his future Jonin Instructor, cough, Kakashi, the poor bastard, cough, for he will sorely need it.
It was almost cruel to Kakashi. But then Hiruzen remembered that he had to wait three hours for the man today. That made him remember all the times the Jonin had made him wait in the past... and all the pity he felt for Kakashi evaporated just like that.
Serves him right.
Besides, he asked for Naruto himself. And so, he shall receive what he asked for. Hiruzen was going to observe that cart wreck with high amus-, er, interest.
His eyes briefly flickered toward Ren's clone, who was leisurely lounging on the couch while silently observing them with an amused smile.
Sigh. If only the man had accepted the promotion.
Hiruzen opened his mouth... only for the door of his office to fly open as Danzo hurriedly entered. That wasn't uncommon. But his distressed expression made Hiruzen instantly tense up. Not many things could make the old warhawk lose his cool.
For a moment, Hiruzen felt a chill go up his spine as he wondered if another war had broken out.
"Who is the shady geezer, old man?" Naruto suddenly interrupted the rising tension in the room with his carefree question." He looks exactly like the dangerous old men who offer kids candy so they can kidnap them because they want to do nefarious things to them. The resemblance is uncanny." Naruto narrowed his eyes at Danzo. "He is suspicious."
Hiruzen raised his eyebrow at him while Danzo scowled. And Ren, well, Ren just snickered.
"And how would you know what these men look like?" Hiruzen asked, idly wondering where Naruto learned words like 'uncanny' or 'nefarious'. Sigh. Kids these days were truly maturing fast.
"Ren told me!" Naruto proudly exclaimed, and all eyes suddenly fell on Ren, who owlishly blinked.
Gently smiling, he humbly spoke as he looked at Danzo. "I am just doing my civic duty. Spreading awareness about threats to Konoha's children is important. You are welcome."
"You are spreading rumors about me!?" Danzo exclaimed, offended.
"Oh, no. I would never. The resemblance is surely just a coincidence! I am certain that such an esteemed personage like Lord Danzo would never hurt, much less kidnap, a child from Konoha. After all, I heard your dream is to be a Hokage!" Ren dramatically sighed, inwardly enjoying how Danzo suddenly tensed and gripped his cane. "And even a massive moron could see that the main job of a Hokage is to safeguard the future of the village, its children. Anybody who harms them could never be allowed to become the Hokage. That would go against every principle this village was built on."
"Well said." Hiruzen happily smiled, taking a drag from his pipe.
Say what you will about Hiruzen and the man did some nasty shit in the position. But he never consciously targeted Konoha's children with the intent to harm them. He was usually the one who protected young, talented ninjas from Danzo.
Even the brainwashing speeches he loved to dish out like candies had no ill intent behind them. Because the man actually believed every damn word he said. It was like a zealous religious fanatic preaching about religious zealotry, creating more zealots. He is not trying to manipulate his audience. He is just preaching what he believes in.
Was that an excuse? No, Ren didn't think so. But the intent mattered for the context. Danzo, unlike Hiruzen, was directly malicious.
During the Uchiha crisis, Hiruzen tried his best to resolve things, but as the Hokage, he couldn't just bow down to their demands, and the Uchihas were not looking for a compromise.
Then, Danzo jumped the gun, and the rest was history.
"Exactly!" Naruto exclaimed, crossing his arms on his chest and firmly nodding with a grin.
Ren stifled his rising smirk and looked at Danzo, who was visibly fuming beneath his crumbling aloof facade.
"See? Even Naruto understands that." Ren said and enjoyed how Danzo gritted his teeth because Naruto was known in the village as a clown and an idiot.
Failing the academy several times in a row had its consequences when even the civilian children usually passed on their first try.
Danzo couldn't really say anything back, however.
Even saying, 'All I did was for Konoha!' in here would be an indirect admission that he harmed Konoha's children. And the Hokage would have to investigate such a claim.
Danzo knew that. Slipping through the rules on technicalities was kinda his thing, after all.
So, instead of responding to Ren, he angrily turned toward the Hokage. "Hiruzen, the Daimyo is coming to Konoha."
"... Why?" Hiruzen stopped in his tracks for a moment and instantly grew wary. The Daimyo was far too busy and usually never left the capital. Something big must have happened for him to move. Something he can't ignore.
"There was a rebellion in one province." Danzo coldly stated. "Evidence about Konoha colluding with the local Lord and dealing in slavery was found."
Hiruzen's stomach dropped. Yeah. That would do it. The one thing the Daimyo could not ignore was civil unrest. One province rebels now, the next one could follow next week, just because the noble thought the Daimyo was losing his grip.
That could not be allowed. The heads were going to roll simply because the Daimyo could not have it any other way. He could not show weakness. He had to deal with this issue decisively.
And if the Lord of that province indeed dealt in slavery so much that his populace rebelled to depose him... he and his family were done for. They would be made an example.
But the evidence of Konoha colluding with him was troubling. Konoha colluded with many nobles in many criminal activities. Such was the nature of their trade. But Hiruzen did not know of any slavery dealings.
"Impossible." He shook his head. "That must be a setup by our enemies. Maybe Iwa? The Land of Earth is known for its slavery practices. This would be right up their alley." He mused aloud.
"I agree." Danzo shamelessly nodded, and Ren almost chortled.
His spies probably didn't learn the fact that the first suspect of these dealings was Danzo himself. The Daimyo's people were not stupid. They would not let that leak.
Ren wondered what expression Hiruzen and Danzo would have when the Daimyo says that in the upcoming meeting. It's going to be pure gold.
Of course, Danzo will weasel out of it. As Hiruzen said, this looked way too much like an enemy setup to cause some trouble for Konoha.
But as long as it forces Danzo to stay low for a few months, at least until Orochimaru's little invasion that, according to the info he gathered via his clones, was definitely coming, then that's alright in Ren's books.
"We should discuss this further." Danzo said, glancing at Naruto and Ren.
Hiruzen nodded, "Naruto, you are dismissed."
"E~h? But..." The boy's expression turned mullish as he was about to start protesting before Ren's hand landed on his shoulder.
"Come. This is something the higher-ups need to deal with." He said, making Naruto deflate because he knew he had no business meddling in these issues.
"Fine." Naruto grudgingly agreed.
But just as Ren was about to lead him out of the office, Hiruzen spoke again.
"Ren, you stay."
'Fuck.' Ren's face fell at exactly the same time as Danzo's, neither expecting that.
Glancing at Danzo, Ren inwardly winced at the narrow-eyed glare the old man was giving him from behind his cold facade. Yeah, the man was probably misunderstanding something, and the target on Ren's back just experienced a threefold increase in size.
But Ren could sympathize. Why would the Hokage let a chunin stay unless he was grooming him for something?
Old men and their games.
Joy.